


Italy's Bullet

by indfirol



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Eventual Smut, Germany is Holy Roman Empire, M/M, Swearing, major charater developement
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-13
Updated: 2015-08-14
Packaged: 2018-04-14 11:28:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 34
Words: 42,233
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4562922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/indfirol/pseuds/indfirol
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>originally from my Wattpad. I switched Japan's L's to R's back then and now it's annoying but I'm not going through 35 chapters and switching his letters back. </p><p>after Japan leaves the axis -for a stupid reason- and joins the allies, Germany tries to get him back, causing a six month battle. but because Italy is part of the axis too, he's forced to go onto the battlefield. Germany tries as hard as he can to protect Italy and himself, but as soon as he's distracted, America makes Japan shoot Italy, hoping that Germany will be too sad to finish the battle. but this only engages him. he takes care of Italy and his wounded shoulder until he finally finishes the fight, leading the axis to victory. but the thing is, Italy isn't the same after its over. every little thing from a helmet to a measly picture of a gun causes him to have a mental break down. will Germany ever get him back to normal after he realizes his feelings for him?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

I was running just about as fast as my legs would let me, the buildings zipped by in a not-so zipping manner. I said I was going my fastest but I never said it was fast. Germany doesn't allow breaks so it was getting hard for me to breathe. I glanced up far ahead at the two of them; Germany and Japan.

Japan looks like he's having some trouble too, but at least he can keep up with him. little beads of sweat roll down his forehead.

"hey Italy,"

I switch my gaze over to Germany. The running doesn't seem to bother him at all, maybe he's going easy on us...

"if you jog faster, I'll let you make pasta."

he doesn't have to say it twice. I get a huge energy burst and pass both of them, laughing like a maniac.

"Italy wait!" I can hear him shout but I ignore him completely.

"PASTAAAAAAA!!!" I scream, running down the dirt path to Germany's house. Once I arrive I scurry into the kitchen, pulling out noodles from the pantry. I set a pot of water onto the warming stove and wait for it to boil.

_Germany is so kind, letting me cook pasta for lunch_.I think, dumping the noodles in.  _I don't really like training but otherwise I love living here. Germany Japan and I all get along great and I don't get beat up! I really hope it stays like this forever.._

it becomes silent as I stir the noodles, adding a few ingredients here and there. I don't like this... I can't hear Germany on the phone and Japan isn't vacuuming the living room. it's too quiet!

"draw a circle that's the earth," I sing to bring in some noise.

"I'm Hetaaaaliiiaaaaaaaaaaaaa!"

"Italy..." a deep voice mumbles from across the kitchen. I look up from the tomato I am cutting to see Germany in the doorway.

"'ve~ hello Doitsu, are you feeling okay?" I question, observing his sad expression.

"Yes, I'm fine," he shuffles to sit on one of the stools in front of the counter. he says he's okay but his face says otherwise. All color is drained from his cheeks, leaving him looking as if he's seen a ghost.

"I just have a headache, that's all." he places his head in his hands.

I frown.  _I really don't like seeing Germany like this, it hurts me inside.. I know! I'm going to help him!_

_"_ why don't you go lay down and I'll bring you tea okay?" I tell him with a smile. he nods and I help him up, holding his arm all the way to his room. I push open the door and Germany drags

his feet in. he plops down on the side of his bed and pulls off his sweaty tank top, exposing his bare chest. a small blush creeps to my cheeks but I hide it, holding my hand to his forehead.

"You do feel a little warm, I'll be right back. do you want black or green tea?" I whisper, afraid that if I talk too loud I'll make his headache worse.

he looks up in my orbs. "green.."

looking into his eyes makes me think he's not actually sick, but something is bothering him. maybe if I gaze deeper, I'll find the cause.

I want to but I have to make his tea. I turn and walk to the door, reaching for the knob.

"um...Italy?" Germany asks. his voice sounds closer. I spin around to see him standing in front of me. I didn't even hear him move! I gasp when he engulfs me in a hug. his toned chest is warm against my cold frame. the blush on my cheeks grows bigger as he holds me like this.

"G-Germany..!" I stutter in complete shock, this is the first time he's hugged me..

I wrap my shaking arms around his torso wearily. he gently holds my head to his chest and I can feel the steady rise and fall of his breathing, though his heart is pounding fast.

"thank you." he says into my ear, causing me to shiver.

I giggle. "you're welcome Doitsu! I think that's the first time you've thanked me.. I just want you to be happy!"

I can feel his mouth shift to a frown against my hair, making my heart drop. he sighs quietly.

"please don't call me that Italy..."

"hm? why?" I ask in confusion, pulling away from the hug. "but Japan gets to call you that."

he started at me with a mixture of sadness and frustration.

"we're not talking about Japan right now." he says firmly, trying to stay calm. why can't we talk about him? this is so confusing...

"Doi- I mean Germany, I think you need to rest. I'll be back with your tea." I change the subject, getting back to the real matters. I place my hands on his chest, pushing him backwards gently. he seems flustered that  _I'm_ the one pushing him onto his bed, his face tinted red. I'm just trying to get him to lie down.

I pull the blankets back and he crawls underneath, bringing the soft fabric to his chin. for a big strong guy, he sure looks cute like this.

I smile at him and leave the room, turning the light off behind me. as I come closer to the kitchen, I smell something burning and an odd sizzling noise catches my attention.

"Ah! My pasta!" I shriek, dashing into the small cooking area to see the water in the pot boiling over and the smell intensifies. steam clouds the kitchen and I start to freak out. I have to take care of this so Germany can sleep, I can't have him solve all my problems.

I snatch the pot holders and move the over flowing noodles to the next burner. the steam is hot as it invades every inch of my exposed skin and causes my hair to stick to my head. I rush to open all the Windows in the kitchen and living room, trying my best to air out the place. I turn off the stove and slide to the floor, back pressed to the cupboards. I sigh in exhaustion, raking my hand through my hair.  _How could I forget I was cooking? I could've burned down his house_... I think fighting back tears.

"Italy? What's going on, where are you?!" I hear Germany shout.  _Oh no... what is he going to think? am I going to get another lecture?_

he bolts around the corner, frantically searching for me. a quiet sob escapes my lips when I see his worried expression. when he finds me curled up on the floor, his scared face changes to one of relief.

"mein gott you're okay." he breathes, falling to his knees. I can't stop it, he looks so frightened. the salty drops begin to fall at a steady pace down my cheeks as I cry out loudly. I fling onto him, wrapping my arms around his neck tightly.

"I-I'm so s-sorry G-Germany!" I wail into his shoulder. his body tenses at first, but then he places his strong arms around my back making me feel protected.

"shh shhh... it's okay Italy. you didn't do anything wrong." he choos trying to calm me down from my state.

minutes past as he cradled me in his lap, stoking my light brown hair. I stopped crying but has the occasional hick.

"I was just so scared that I had set your house on fire, b-but I didn't want to bother you so I handled it myself...." I whisper.

he sighs in exasperation and our eyes meet, blue against Brown.

"what? Italy you know I would have taken care of this to keep you safe." his orbs swarm with sadness yet look so caring, making my insides want to melt.

"I know."


	2. Chapter 2

what is this feeling...? I just want to show Italy more appreciation that he's here but... it doesn't feel like appreciation. different somehow. why am I acting so weird and why am I worrying about him so much? when I'm around him I become so vulnerable, weak. he's just my ally, that's all.

I silently debate with myself while bobbing the tea bags in our mugs. I crane my neck to look at him, watching as he struggles to remove the sticky pasta goop from the pot. he has his sleeves rolled up to his elbows and his face Is red with the effort of scraping the paste from the sides.

the corners of my mouth twitch when I turn back to the tea, trying to fight the oncoming smile.

"Germany?"

"Yes?"

"is it okay if I wash the rest of the dishes before dinner? I know Japan usually does it but he's not here right now."

Oh why does he keep talking about Japan?

"s-sure." I stutter, nodding my head. my voice filled to the brim with sadness.

as I watch the tea, my mind wanders off to this morning. maybe I was working them a bit too hard... Italy obviously doesn't like it but he stayed. why? has Japan felt like this the entire time he was part of the Axis Powers?

"Germany, I'm leaving. your training is too difficult for me to handle and I hate watching Italy try so hard to keep up but you're never satisfied. Consider me no part of the Axis, I am sorry." his voice rings in my head. my blood begins to boil in frustration just at the thought of him leaving. I know I still have Italy but his troops are a bunch of cowards. Japan was my strongest ally, he didn't like my training, but he had techniques of his own.

what a stupid reason to lea-

I'm broken out of my thoughts by Italy's scream.

"GERMANY GERMANY! HELP ME IT HUURRRTSSSSS OW OW!!"

I spin around quickly to see Italy holding a knife in his red hand, a small cut along his palm.

"HELP ME I'M GOING TO DIE I'M TOO YOUNG TO DIE I'M STILL A VIRGIN-" he shrieks, shaking uncontrollably before I interrupt.

"Italy is just a cut, you aren't going to die, let's go wrap it." I sigh taking the knife from his grasp and laying it on the counter.

I drag him and his sniffles to the bathroom and lift him onto the sink. he begins to cry again as I hold his hand under the running faucet. I gently wash of his wound, watching the blood drip down the drain.

"Italy calm down, I'm just making it better.." I coo, running my left hand through his silky hair.

his expression falls to a relaxed but still hurting look. I know it's just a little scratch, but it hurts me to see him like this. what if he really does get shot while running through Switzerland? How would me cry then? I shudder at the thought and Italy notices.

"G-Germany," he sputters in between hicks. "what I-is the matter?" his tear-filled orbs lock onto mine. I guess he really does pay me a lot of attention. enough to know when I'm bothered while he's hurt. usually I would think he should be worrying about himself when in reality he puts everyone before him.

he uses his right hand to touch my face, fingers skimming my cheek. he gazes into my eyes for what seems like an eternity, his expression calm.

"Italy.." I mutter, locked in his stare. his already pink cheeks flare with a deep blush, looking over to the side. his hand drops in his lap.

I blink, snapped out of my trance. I remove his cut from the running water, accidentally keeping it under longer than intended.

"Sorry." he whispers, gripping his hand to his chest.

"d-don't be, you didn't do anything wrong." I assure him, moving to the medicine cabinet. I rummage through the bottles and boxes, my fingers searching for the gauze and wrap. upon finding I pull them out and place them on the counter.

"No. you aren't feeling well and I was supposed to help you today. but you're the only one that's done any helping." he explains. the entire time, he's been trying to do things for me but I've stolen his spotlight.. his face expresses a look of apology.

the corners of my mouth twitch as I reach for his hand. once again, putting others first.

"honestly Italy," I whisper, placing a square piece of gauze on the cut. "You don't need to worry so much about me. I'm a grown man."

"I just wanted to repay you for all that you've done for me, even if it was the smallest task. I would probably be alone right now if you hadn't opened the box and I thank you for that..." Italy says, a tear slipping down his flushed cheeks. he winces as I spin the wrap around his palm, pulling it tight.

"there, now you won't die. don't worry about repaying me so much okay? I like doing things for you." I reassure him, helping him off the sink.

"ve~ thank you Germany!" he exclaims, that retarded look back on his face. he stands up on his toes, extending his neck to kiss my cheek. he giggles and runs off to the living room, leaving me alone. i see myself in the mirror, face tinted a light pink. my slicked back hair left a few strands dangling in my eyes. I brush them back and walk into my room. might as well put a shirt on at least.

I open my dresser and search for my white tank top, slipping it over my head. what are we going to do now? Japan's gone, and I need to get him back. but I have no idea where he even is! he's probably gone back to his country. maybe I should just leave him alone, but we wouldn't be the Axis without him... I'm sure he'll come to his senses and return.


	3. Chapter 3

Dinner

_____________________

After the whole fiasco with the pasta and Italy cutting his hand, we agreed on an easy solution: frozen pizzas. it sure as hell is a lot easier than trying to make dinner. again. plus nobody is going to accidentally chop off their hand putting a simple pizza in the oven.

"'ve~ this is great!" Italy exclaims, plopping down at the kitchen table. "No matter what we went through today, we still ended up eating Italian! isn't it wonderful?" his big eyes smile at me and for the first time, I notice how beautiful they actually are. with his eyes squinted shut all the time, I never get to see his caramel brown pools. they complete his face, almost a perfect match for his light brown hair, making him look years younger than he actually is.... how old is he anyway? I can't help but wonder as he watches me pull the gooey pizza out of the oven. he's completely turned around in his seat, head rested on the back of the chair. I place the pizza in the middle of the table, giving a small grin when he basically dives for a slice. the hungry Italian scarfs down half his piece by the time I sit in my chair.

13 I decide, taking a piece for myself. inside he's like a teenager; always hungry, always lazy, and always complaining. but he's probably almost 2,000 years old.

"Yes. it is." I reply. his head snaps up, leaving behind a bridge of cheese.

"voo vearry tink so?" he muffles with his mouth full. I chuckle lightly as his reaction. I usually don't answer things like that, I just leave it rhetorical and he's come to know that, not expecting a reply.

"yeah, I like seeing you this happy. now eat, we have training tomorrow and need sleep."

he nods and continues eating but I can see his mind is elsewhere, his vacant eyes staring at his plate. I try not to notice, taking small bites of my pizza, but I'm so curious as to what he's thinking about. maybe he's just tired, I guess it's been a rough day for both of us..

just before I'm about to ask him what's wrong, he gives me my answer. "where is he?"

I raise one eyebrow and cock my head in confusion. what is he taking about?

"where's who?"

“Japan. he's been gone all day and he hasn't come home yet."

my heart drops to my stomach. how will I explain this...

I can feel a bead of sweat roll down my forehead in nervousness and a lump forms in my throat, preventing me from telling him the truth.

"uh- well you see...he uh.. went to the market earlier, and it got late, so he uh.. stayed in his country. I'm sure his paper work is stacking up so he might be gone for a while.." I lie in a not so smooth way.

"You must not be feeling good after all Germany! you never stutter." he giggles, wiping the sauce off his face with his sleeve.

we eat the rest of our meal in silence after that and I put our plates in the sink. I can hear the big rain droplets pound on the roof like bullets. it's going to be a storm tonight... another reason for Italy to cry. I sigh and wander into the living room, sitting on the couch. I pick up the book off the small lamp table and begin to read, crossing my legs.

No matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't get lost in the story. I stare at the same page, rereading the same sentences for what seems like forever because the words just don't process. my mind keeps going back to Japan. maybe I'll call him tomorrow, try and talk things through with him.

I still don't understand why he's acting so childish! a little training doesn't hurt anybody, so why did he leave? my eyes widen at a certain thought. 'I hate watching Italy try so hard to keep up but you're never satisfied.' does Japan, maybe, like Italy for some reason...? ...nien... he may be creepy with that camera of his but I never expect him to be... gay or anything. but... do I? is that that other feeling that's not appreciation? NIEN! I'M DEFINITELY NOT GAY!

I shake my head, trying to get the weird assumptions out of my mind. a loud crash sounds outside, like the clanging of trashcan lids, and a flash of light comes soon after startling me a bit.

three... two...one...

I hear the sound of feet padding down the hallway at a rapid pace against the hardwood flooring, telling me that Italy is coming

he scrambles into the living room and almost knocks over the coffee table just to fly onto me, latching on my arm arm like a leech.

perfect timing.

"Germany Germany!" he cries, repeating my name as usual. I just set down the book and lift him into my lap, holding him like a baby. he clutches onto my white tee shirt, burying his face in my chest. I can feel him shaking and quivering in fear.

I honestly didn't know he was this scared of lightning... it makes me feel sorry...

I soothingly hold him there, drawing circles into his back with my fingertips. he's just so adorable like this, so.... vulnerable. I feel my face heat up madly and I mentally slap myself for thinking such things. 

soon enough I feel him breathing at a steady pace, his body limp. he fell asleep. I glance at the clock ticking away on the wall; 9:24. I decide it's time for bed for the both of us and I carefully stand up, holding him gently in fear of waking him.

I walk us both to my bedroom, knowing at one point during the night he'll come crawling into bed with me anyways. after I tuck him under the sheets, I remove my pants and join him. almost instinctively, as if I was a teddy bear, he wraps his skinny arms around my waist, curling up to me. I close my eyes and rest my cheek on top of his head, slowly drifting off into sleep as the storm goes on.


	4. Chapter 4

Japan's POV

________________

"Dude Japan! What's up bro?" I hear the familiar American accent call down the market isle. I turn away from the manga to see him striding towards me like the hero he thinks he is. America. the self centered, childish and ridiculous man who needs a head shrinker. but I will never come out and say that to his face.

"Oh, herro America. how are you?" I reply, placing one of the books in the shopping basket.

"I'm good dude. Hey, where are Germany and Italy? are they here with you? I mean Italy practically follows you everywhere so..."

I can feel my lips tighten into a line but he doesn't seem to notice, staring at one of the magazine's with half naked women on the cover.

"No... I'm not with them anymore." I tell him. why did I even leave? just because I can't keep up with Germany's training doesn't mean I need to put my country in danger. I mean, they were like part of my country themselves, Germany and Italy always helped me when I had trouble with it. now that they're gone, I don't have that extra help and protection. though I think having a little time to myself won't hurt. I'll go back at some point. but what will they think of me? a coward?

"so, you're on your own now? you're out of the axis?" he questions, raising a blond eyebrow and looks at me.

"yeah? so what?"

"maybe, if I talk to them enough, you can join us!! be part of the allies! with your Japanese technology we can like, make huge robots to dominate! plus you got some wicked awesome fighting skills!!" he exclaims a bit too loud, getting weird looks from passerby. if humans found out about us countries, who knows what will happen? his face Is full on anticipation as he bounces up and down on his toes. "this'll be awesome!!!"

"No." I say plainly. he automatically freezes and gapes at me, his mouth hanging open.

"what?"

"I said no. after I've had a rittle... vacation.. I'm going back."

he snickers and shoves his hands in the pockets of his bomber jacket. "back to boring Ludwig and annoying Feliciano I guess. why would you want to be with them, when you can be training with the HERO? with your addition to the group, we can be so powerful!! And you want to be with them? sure Germany is strong but Italy is a huge baby!!"

"how do you know their names?" I ask confused. countries are only supposed to reveal them to their allies or close friends.

he grins. "I have my ways."

I think for a moment. he can find out information that not a lot of people can, plus if I join them, I'll have the entire allied forces on my side. that's more than just Germany and Italy... 

I'll be.... strong.. maybe it wouldn't be such a bad idea to join with them. see what happens.. plus if I decide to go back, I'll have information.

I sigh and he looks back up at me again from the magazine, now in his hands. a glint of hope flashes through his eyes and he smiles.

"you're considering?" he asks, grinning ear to ear.

"a rittle. I guess it wouldn't be that bad of an idea."

he jumps up and exclaims happily. "Yes! a new member! come with me! we're going to my place. they're all waiting there for me to get back." he grabs onto my arm and I drop my basket as he pulls me with his amazing strength towards the exit.

"w-wait America, I didn't buy my things-" I stutter, being dragged like a rag doll to his car.

"that doesn't matter dude! we need to get you to my house to settle things. especially with the old man, he's not going to think it's a good I idea, having an axis soldier and all."

I gulp nervously as I climb into the passenger seat, watching as America gets behind the wheel. is this really a good idea? what if they think I'm some sort of spy? well technically I am doing this kind of in Germany and Italy's favor, getting information. so yeah a spy.

the entire ride to his country is long and silent, only the soft pur of his red convertible is audible. it reminds me of when italy took me for a... ride... in his red convertible. I never want to see him behind the wheel of a car again. I look out the window and daydream about my time with Italy and Germany. it was fun while it lasted when we weren't training.

the hills and pastures zip by as the car speeds at least 20 miles over the speed limit. he's a crazy driver.

"we're here, my house is just up this road. I own acres so I basically live out in the middle of no where." he says, easing up on the gas. the car slows and I hear the pebbles crunch under the tires. 

as we roll up to a huge farm house, I spot four other cars in the driveway. they are here.

he cuts off the engine and looks over at me.

"are you nervous?"

"no." I lie easily, removing my seatbelt.

"you should be."

well that doesn't make me feel any better. my heart leaps in my chest as he leads me to his front door. he jingles his keys in the door lock, letting it swing open.

"I'm home!" he calls into the huge hallway. his house is actually quite nice, the light maroon walls go good with the Brown leather sofa in the room ahead.

"ah bonjour mon ami!" France yells, striding down the hallway towards us, his hips swaying. "you've returned."

"ugh, you're too perky you bloody frogg.." England grumbled from the sofa, setting his tea on the coffee table.

"I brought Japan with me! you'll never guess where I ran into him at-"

"Japan?!" England exclaims, giving America the death glare. "why?!"

America scoffs looking down at me. "I knew the old man wouldn't approve."

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING OLD MAN?!"

"nothing nothing..." America mumbles, placing a hand on my back, gently nudging me forward. it feels... weird.

he pushes me into the room and I see Russia sitting in the arm chair, knitting. this shocks me because Russia doesn't seem to be the kind of person who knits. the entire time, I can feel the scornful eyes of England burning holes in the back of my head.

"So everybody! I brought him here today, because he is currently out of the axis. I figured he could join us!" America exclaims, rupturing a few eardrums I'm sure.

"bloody hell you can't be serious. obviously he's just acting as a spy! we can't trust him." England scoffs, giving America the you-haven't-figured-that-out-yet? look.

"I believe that Japan is not an axis spy. tell 'em buddy!" he says, giving me a friendly- yet painful- whack on the back.

I clear my throat nervously. "there have been some issues between Germany and I, so I reft. he was simpry too hard going on his training and I couldn't take it."

"I didn't see you as a man to give up. ohonhonhon" France chuckles from his seat on the sofa next to Russia. he crosses his legs and rests his head on his palm.

when I didn't respond, America did for me. "and he's not. if he had given up, he would have let down his country. that's why he is joining us!"

"I see no reason why we should let him in." England says simply. he really is a negative person.

"I do." America argues, folding his arms across his chest.

"and what is that? he's a spy!"

"is not! he just left the axis, and obviously he's going to need someone else to help him protect his country."

"why does that have to be US?"

"think about it, it would benefit us too! Japan has some awesome technology that would help us dominate!"

"that still doesn't mean we can trust him!"

"what if we made him sign the contract?" Russia's voice cut in. I almost forgot he was there considering how quiet he is.

the room went silent as they considered it. contact? why would I have to sign a contract? I feel like there is something they are not going to tell me...

"maybe... i suppose we can trust him after he signs it.."

"which contract is this again?" America asks confused, scratching the back of his neck.

England and France both stand up, walking him into the hall out of earshot. Russia soon follows behind, leaving me alone and confused.


	5. Chapter 5

(still Japan's POV)

_____________________

soon enough they walk back in, a thin packet in England's hand.

"sit down dude, we gotta talk about this." America says gesturing towards the dining room behind me. I take a seat at one of the nice, mahogany chairs that matches with its mahogany table. his whole house is absolutely gorgeous. a crystal chandelier dripped from the roof, just above the table with its vase of daisies.

the other countries join me, looking weary enough. they think I'll break the contract. and I can tell England still doesn't trust me.

he slides the papers in front of me and hands me a pen.

"basically, this is a peace treaty. each paper is for each of us countries. the last paper you have to sign tells us that we can trust you and you're not an axis spy. got it?" he explains.

I nod and pick up the pen, not bothering to actually read the papers.

I begin to write my name 'J-

"you're real name." France butts in, tapping his finger on the name line.

I scowl to myself. what if I sign this, and can't go back after a month? well... I'm not with them anymore. it's okay to do this..

my hand begins to shake a bit. I'm not exactly sure with myself if I should be doing this or not. this could be a huge mistake...

I will myself to continue. more power..for the sake of my country..

'Kiku Honda' I scribble on the sheet of paper, one after the next. the countries smile at each other in a devious way, making me nervous. except for Russia, he merely grins from his seat with his innocent face, but we all no he's anything but.

"great! you're officially a member of the allied forces bro, welcome to the family!" America exclaims, clapping me on the back, making me lurch forward a bit.

the other nations stand up and bid their goodbyes and one by one file out the door, leaving me alone in America's house.

"you can stay here for tonight and I'll drive you back to the market so you can get your car... just make yourself comfortable!" he smiles and stomps up the stairs.

I sit alone at his dining room table with nothing to do. What do I do? I'm a part of the allies now, and I'm clueless. what are Italy and Germany going to think? I've completely betrayed our friendship... maybe I can talk America into letting me leave after a month. but that would be completely irrational! after a month I will know most of their information, they will never let me leave! They even left the room to discuss the contract so obviously they are hiding something.. I should have never signed it, what have I gotten myself into?


	6. Chapter 6

Italy's POV

__________________

the bed shakes wildly and I hear Germany's strong voice shouting my name.

"Italy! get up! we have training!"

I groan in protest, turning over in the sheets and return to my pasta filled dreams. he merely rips off the sheets and yanks on my curl, trying to get me up.

my eyes shoot open and a huge blush floods my cheeks as I moan loudly.

"ah..G-Germany.. don't d-do that.."

he gives me a look of confusion, wondering what just happened. then realization strikes him and his cheeks flush pink.

"uh- j-just get up okay? I'll leave you in here to get ready a-and such..." he stutters, then dashes out of the room. now he'll remember not to do that again...

I stumble out of bed, trying to forget what just happened. a small yawn escapes my lips and I slip on a big shirt, making my way to the kitchen for breakfast. as I walk in, Germany is at the stove making wursts in a skillet, the pink still lingers a bit. he looks up and sees me walk in, the pink once again flaring up at my outfit; one of his shirts which is 3 sizes too big and my Italian flag boxers.

"that's my band shirt you know, Prussia bought it for me on my birthday last year." he says, trying to hide the amusement in his voice.

I look down to spell out the name.

"rr- omsteeen"

"Rammstein" he corrects me, smiling at my failed attempt. he puts the sizzling wursts on a plate and places it on the table.

"eat, we have training."

"but why can't we eat the left over pizza from last night?" I protest, poking at my sausage with a fork. he rolls his eyes in an annoyed manner and sits down, cutting his into pieces.

TIME SKIP 7:00 am

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and now my day repeats itself, the same as yesterday, except Japan is still in his country doing paper work. I'm happy that fratello does it for me so that I don't accidentally sign a paper that gives part of my land to a different country. that would be bad. very bad.

"c'mon Italy, raise your arms higher! these are jumping jacks, not hopping bunnies!" Germany commands as he performs one handed push ups.

"if I look like a bunny....., am I a cute bunny.....?" I ask, super out of breath.

he sighs and rolls his eyes again. while he isn't looking, I run across the field and hid behind a tree to play with a cute little cat that I play with everyday. Carino's sleek ginger fur poofs up between my fingers and he rubs his face against my cheek, making me giggle.

"Italy!!! your training isn't done yet!!!" I hear Germany yell, searching for me. he had yet to find my hiding spot behind this tree, he'll never figure it-

"Italy, get back over here." his grumpy voice rumbles behind me, making goose bumps stand up on my arms. I whip my head around to see him towering over me.

he sighs and brings his hand to his hair, closing his eyes. "alright fine. here's the deal. you can do all the training that is necessary for today, or you can run 2 laps. BUT," he pauses, holding up a finger. "but you have to wear my battle helmet."

my eyes widen in shock, he's never made me do that before...

do I have to wear it? but every time he even suggests me trying it on I freak out, but I want to be a stronger person don't I?

"o-ok, fine... I'll do it..." I mumbled in a low voice, looking back down at Carino. I can't control my hands as they begin to shake. I glance up at Germany to see his slightly hurt expression. the kind of expression somebody makes when they are trying to hide their sadness.

"....really? Are you sure? I mean, I made the deal but I didn't think you'd take it... I just wanted you to finish training."

"No Germany, I want to be a strong nation like you. and I know I'll have to go into a real war one day, not just a small argument, I need to be prepared for what's really out there. I need to see what's really happening in this world and open my eyes for the first time in a long time." I whisper, a small tear rolling down my cheek. a memory of Holy Rome flashes through my mind, reminding me that he's never going to return, no matter how much I pray. for years after he disappeared, I hoped he would come back to me and never leave again. but when the realization slowly came to mind, I shut my eyes, never wanting to see the world for how cruel it is, taking the only person who truly understood me out of my grasp.

he sighs and extends his hand. I take it hesitantly, preparing myself to face my fear. he pulls me to my feet and I follow him to his -or our- house. every step closer to the building makes me even more nervous. once inside he opens the closet next to the front door and pulls out a slightly dusty dark green metal helmet, causing my breath to hitch in my throat.

"Italy, calm down, it's not like this is your worst enemy." Germany says in a reassuring tone, though it isn't very reassuring.

"or is it?" I choke out, loosening the collar to my blue uniform. if I could go back in time and be sitting by the tree, I would have chosen the first option, but it's too late now.

Germany gives me a worried look, then walks out the front door, helmet under his arm. I follow suit and we end up at the dirt road a little too fast for comfort. why can't we be snails? I unbutton my uniform top and slide it off, leaving me in a white tank top.

he gazes into my eyes reluctantly, making sure I want to do this. I stand up straighter, fixing my posture and nodding for him to go on. he exhales loudly and slips the metal thing on my head, clicking the latch under my chin. I want to scream and throw it off, but I have to be strong for Germany...

"if you want I can make it 1-"

"No", I cut him off. "I'll do both laps..."

he steps back and I position myself in the middle of the road, ready to run.

"ready," Germany starts. a pang of fear hits my heart, but I ignore it, closing my eyes, the eyes I've decided to keep open.

"set," what if I get shot? That's my biggest fear about this helmet, but I have to know I'm not going to get shot. there's no reason. my face twists slightly in nervousness and discomfort.

"...go.." the word rings in my head and I feel like my heart is going to explode out of my chest. through all of this fear I push myself to move forward. my feet move quickly over the wet soil from last night's rain, causing mud to stick to my boots.

it reminds me of a rainy battle and I'm running away from the enemy, rifle in hand, though I'm too nervous to remember how to use it. my hands shake uncontrollably and I drop it, but now it's lost, just as I am in this bloody battle. I quickly look around in every direction, trying to see through the fog, or maybe it isn't fog, but tears.

a tall black figure begins to loom in front of me, my own rifle in his hands. as the fog leaves my sight, letting me see who it is, I find that it's Germany. I reach for my gun, but he pulls it back and points the end at me. I try to cry out for him to stop but nothing escapes my cracked lips. I fall to my knees, the mud splashing around me. I instinctively throw my arms in front of me, as if they could penetrate bullets.

"Germany! no! please!!" I scream out, the only words that seem to want to come out. I look up through teary eyes to see him bring the gun up to his shoulder, flicking the glock back.

"STOP!!!" I scream as loud as possible, but it only sounds like a mere echo. "STOP STOP STOP!!"

"Italy!! Italy snap out of it!!!"

my eyes fling open and I see Germany in front of me again. I'm on my knees with my hands unconsciously trying to undo the strap of the helmet.

"GET AWAY FROM ME!" I shout, scurrying as far away as possible from him.


	7. Chapter 7

Germany's POV

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"GET AWAY FROM ME!" Italy screams, an expression of terror plastered on his usually cheerful face. the words explode out if his mouth in utter fear, causing me to shatter inside.

all I'm trying to do is help him! what just happened? he was lost in a completely different world!

"Italy... I'm not going to hurt you.." I say, my voice wavering. his hands frantically scratch at his neck, trying to remove my helmet. I knew I should have never offered that deal, I didn't think he would take it! he would never touch the helmet let alone wear it. "let me help you take it off."

I reach out to him but he slaps my hand away with a force I never knew he carried. "NO! STAY AWAY!"

he needed to remove that helmet or he wasn't going to be okay.

"Italy, we have to take it off of you if you'll just let-"

"NO! DON'T KILL ME PLEASE!"

"I'M NOT GOING TO KILL YOU!" I shout, tackling him down so he couldn't move. he's beginning to really wear down my patience. he squirms and screams beneath me, attempting to get out of my grasp. with my knees I pin him to the wet dirt and use my hands to unlock the latch, though it was difficult considering we kept hitting them away and shaking his head back and forth.

"DAMMIT ITALY STOP MOVING!"

finally the latch flings free and the helmet rolls off of his head. I watch as the glint of light returns back to his dull eyes, eyes that look as if they have seems worse things than I know.

"G-Germany..." he whispers, clutching onto my tank top. he gives out a shaky breath and his eyes slowly close.

"Italy..?..... ITALY?!?!"

"well well what's going on here? kesesese" a familiar voice rings behind me. I turn to see Prussia striding down the dirt road with his hands in his pockets, the usual smirk displayed on his face.

"Quick Gilbert! I think he needs help!" I say, climbing off of him and picking him up. his frail, light body bounces motionless and It makes me want to cry. but not in front of Gilbert. my heart races against its cage and it might just pop out.

what if he's dead? I don't remember how to check for a pulse... dammit!

"West, I think he's fine." he points out and I feel Italy move. I glance down to see him curl up in a little ball in my arms. I let out a sigh of relief and hold him tighter. I really had thought I'd lost him...

"let's go in.." I whisper, gesturing towards my house. Prussia moves ahead of me and holds the door open, odd for his careless behavior. I brush it off and move passed him, carrying Italy to my bedroom. once in I gently place him on the bed and remove his boots, afraid of waking him.

so he just fell asleep? not uncommon for the Italian to pass out wherever he pleases. I wonder what was going on in that head of his...

I pull the covers over his chin and turn off the lamp beside him. I'll let him rest for a while. looks like our training is over for the day.. I sigh and leave the room, trudging out into the kitchen where Prussia was digging through the fridge.

"What is your business here?" I demand, taking a seat at the table. after what just happened I'm not in the best mood.

"well I guess there won't be any brotherly love shared here will there?" Prussia snorted, placing a beer in front of me and sitting down on the opposite side of the table. normally he would have just gotten a beer for himself, he's acting a bit too friendly..

"look, I just want to know why your here, you hardly ever stop by to visit. so why now?" I breath, leaning back in my chair. I pop open the can and take a long swig.

"well why don't we talk about other things first." he says, opening his own. as he takes a drink, Gilbird happily pecks at the can.

"Like what?! you always change the subject from the actual matter bruder, why not just tell me!?" I yell, standing up. my chair tips back and clatters against the wall.

"that's why. My bad new will only stress you further."

"Oh so it's bad?! then you should tell me because it's about me!"

"I never said it was about you." he pointed out like the smart ass he is.

"well is it?!"

"yes."

"THEN THERE! JUST TELL ME ALREADY!"

he sighs in frustration and brings his hand up to his face, rubbing the bridge of his nose.

"Japan joined the Allies."

my whole mind seemed to stop functioning.

he... is our enemy now...?

"WHY THE FUCK DID HE DO THAT?!" I exclaim, throwing my hands in the air.

"he... he did?" a small voice squeaks from the kitchen opening.

my head snaps over to see Italy peeking into the kitchen, a few tears slipping down his cheeks.

"d-does that mean I'll n-never get to see him a-again?" he sobs, running over and wrapping his arms around me.

I run my hand through his hair soothingly and Prussia gives me a weird look, raising his eyebrow.

"you will. we all will. I promise you I'll get him back."


	8. Chapter 8

Germany's POV

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(ballistophobia- fear of missiles or fear of being shot)

two weeks have past since Italy and I found it about Japan joining the allied forces, and let me tell you, it was hell.

Italy tried to calm me down multiple times from my stressed out state, and I need to find a way to get Japan back on our side. Italy refuses to tell me what was happening in his head when he wore the helmet and Gilbert ended up drinking the last beer! but because of how stressed out I am, Italy won't let me go to the store to buy more. besides, I can't send him to do it, they think he looks to young to be buying alcohol and he lost his damn ID.

I'm a huge coward, why am I afraid to call him? he's already a part of the enemy team and we don't just randomly call up England and ask him for tea. that's not a normal thing to do...

I slightly hesitate as I reach for the phone, my hand trembling a bit. why does it have to be so stuffy in my office? can't I open a window? I scan along the walls to find that in fact they are open.

I sigh. c'mon Germany, get it together! You're a man, so act like one! not like an Italy! I pick up the phone and bring it to my ear, listening to the soft ring as it waits for me to punch in Japan's number. I dial and impatiently wait for him to pick up. after the fourth ring he answers.

"Herro?"

"uh- um.. hallo Japan, it's me." I stutter, the words tumbling out of my mouth rather than rolling like I wanted.

"Oh... Germany.. how are you?" he hesitates in between words. he obviously doesn't want to talk to me, I wouldn't blame him.

"I.. I was wondering if maybe, would you consider coming back?"

there was silence on the other end for a minute and I thought he'd hung up, but I can hear his breathing.

"I really wish I could... there are reasons we formed the axis powers and we all had our reasons, and now I can't go back."

"well... well why not?"

"I... it's kind of confidential, but I signed a contract so I'm stuck with them. if I went back, I wouldn't be able to attack, the contract incruded peace treaties with all of their countries."

"BUT JAPAN I MISS YOU!!!!" another voice exclaims.

"Italy! what phone are you using?!"

".....the one in the living room."

"well you don't need to be listening in on us! hang up now or its 50 push ups!"

a shrill shriek sounded on the other end and he hung up immediately.

I sigh in frustration. "just... just consider it alright?"

"I don't see a way of me being of any use to the axis if I can't even attack them. I'm sorry but I can't come back.."

"but-"

"I have to go. meeting to attend." and with that he hung up.

"damn it damn it DAMN IT!!" I shout, banging my fist on my desk. I don't even notice the oak doors to my office creak open and the little Italian step inside. I lay my head down on my desk, wanting my throbbing headache to disappear. the only cure I know for a head ache is alcohol.

I slight clatter tells me something was placed on my desk. I lift my head up to see a plate and a mug. Italy had brought me wursts and.. pasta. the corners if my mouth tug up into a smile and before I can thank him, he slips out and quietly shuts the door.

\------------------

Italy's POV

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I gently click the door to Germany's study shut, smiling a bit. I know he's going through a lot right now and all I need to see is a little grin from him. I thought it would be nice to make him lunch. I can tell he has a headache so I placed a couple if his pain relieving pills in a plastic bag beside his tea.

I drag my feet into the kitchen. I know this won't be his only attempt to get Japan back. when Germany has his mind set to a goal, he makes sure he achieves it...

my smile falters a little as I grab the skillet off the stove and move it to the sink. I'm not used to it... I'm not used to being left out so much. I know he doesn't mean it but I'm not getting the kind of attention I usually do... and it makes me lonely.. it makes me sound like a needy child, dependent on everybody else.

I talked to the doctor the other day and he told me I have Ballistophobia. badly. I wanted to see if he knew of any cures but unfortunately he said there wasn't a way to cure it through medication. but he did give me a bottle of antidepressants, instructing me to only take them when I'm freaking out like I did with the helmet or before I freak out. he said taking these will help me relax temporarily from that fear, but not fully cure it.

I decided that I would only use them if there was a sudden battle or emergency and hid them in my clothes drawer. if Germany found them he would get the totally wrong idea.

I began scrubbing the pan and washing the grease away. if this loneliness continues I may just end up with depression, then I would be taking them more than I want to.. but I want Germany and the others to be happy, so I always put them before myself.

I dry the skillet and put it back in its spot in the cupboard. I make my way to the living room and sit down on the couch, lost in thought. I have nothing else to do today, not like I do anything productive anyways.

I wonder, if I took one or two of those before I put on a helmet, would my fear be gone for a little while? then I won't be so afraid to go into battle when it happens.

a ring at the door bell knocks me out of my trance. who could that be? is Germany expecting someone? I hop off the couch and swing the front door open.

"ciao- JAPAN?! what are you doing here?!" I stammer in shock, my eyes growing wide.

he looks down and fiddles with the hem of his uniform.

"I skipped the meeting to come here..." he whispers. I don't know how to respond to that, scratching the back if my neck. I gasp in surprise as he engulf me in a hug.

"j-japan? but y-you don't like it when I hug you-"

"I don't want to go back... they say such horrible things about you guys. let me hide here please, just for the night, then I'll find a different place tomorrow." he sobs.

"wow Japan, I've never seen you show your weakness in front of people." a voice says behind us. Japan instantly lets go and wipes away his tears as Germany walks into the room.

"Italy, shut the door and lock it." Germany orders. I do as I'm told, slightly alarmed at his serious face.

"I thought you had a meeting." he starts

"I do.."

"then why are you here?"

"because you guys want me to come back."

"the real reason."

Japan stays silent for a moment, face growing red in embarrassment. "I hate it there. they are terrible people..."

Germany rubs the bridge of his nose and sighs. "fine, but only for the night. and we will hide you so it's gonna be the basement." I see a smile light up Japan's usually nonchalant face. I know he will be okay, the basement is actually quite warm and cozy, I only don't like it because it's dark...

"thank you Doitsu." he bows with gratitude.


	9. Chapter 9

Italy's POV

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I lay in my bed, thinking about how Japan is actually going to rebel against them. he's always loyal to his word, so if he signed a contract, why isn't he sticking to it? I mean, I'm happy that he's back in our house, even if it is only for the night. it just feels right.

a thump sounds downstairs, making me spring up in bed. I begin to shake but I need to calm down it was probably just one of Germany's dogs. I lay back down and pull the blankets to my chin, but my eyes never close. the dogs don't make noise in the night, they sleep. all of a sudden Adler, the German shepherd, begins to bark. I jump out of bed and move to my dresser. I pop one of the pills in my mouth and swallow it down with the glass of water on the nightstand.

I dig through and find my pistol, the one I never touch but keep for emergencies. if I'm gonna be strong like Germany, I gotta act like him.

I grab my white flag by the door and move out into the hallway. I can't help it, it gives me a sense of protection and I need it now more than ever. the last time I held this pistol was when I put it in the dresser years ago.

the door across the hall way flies open and Germany steps out, his own pistol in hand. he gives me a look like 'you're actually holding that thing?' I nod and close my eyes, swallowing the lump in my throat. get it together Italy, for Germany's sake..

I hold my gun out in front of me in a ready position as Germany and I glide through the hallway. we make it into the living room and I gasp, my eyes pooling with tears. Adler lay motionless in the middle of the carpet. the dogs stay outside during the day so they come inside in the night. I glanced at Germany and see the pain written all over his face, though soon it turns to anger.

he checks both sides of the hallway, making sure it's clear before running over to Adler. I watch in anticipation while he holds his hands to the dog's neck, checking for a pulse.

"hello." an overly sweet voice says behind me and I freeze. everybody knows that voice, and everybody is afraid of it.Germany spins around, pointing the gun right over my shoulder.

"Now Italy," he says. I see a blade come into view in front of my face and I begin to cry. "if I were you, I would drop the gun." he drags the blade gently along my cheek, making me openly weep in pain.

I begin trembling uncontrollably and I drop the pistol and my flag, putting my hands raising out in front of me.

"I-I SURRENDER!!!" I cry out, my tears spilling over my cheeks. the other allies move from out of shadows and corners, snickering. one of them is missing. only France, China and England come out and I know for a fact Russia is behind me.

Germany flicks his gun back and forth between France and China, then over my shoulder again. I think I have a feeling I know where America is.

"we've come to collect a friend of ours Allemagne, and we believe you have him." France explains, pacing the room.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Germany growls. "what did you do to my dog."

China giggle a bit. "I knocked him out with a tranquilizer aru."

Russia moves the blade down to my throat. "So you don't mind that we checked your basement da?" 

almost on Que, the basement door swings open and America and Japan walk out, America holds Japan's hands behind his back with his amazing strength.

"You kidnap our friends and there will be consequences." America says, his face completely serious for the first time.

"b-but we didn't- ah- kidnap him!" I choke out and Russia presses it harder against my throat, but not hard enough to break the skin.

"don't listen to them, they came to my home and brought me here. they threw me down in the basement and pressured me for information." Japan whispers.

Germany's expression is one of shock, but he stays quiet instead of arguing. My heart feels as if it has frozen and been coated in ice. he's a traitor... more salty drops fall and I sob loudly.

"So no one is denying it, eh?" America says with a smirk.

"i-it's a trick," I weep. “they s-sent Japan here to say those things t-to start a f-fight."

the nation's all look at me in surprise, then France begins to laugh.

"ohonhonhon I guess my little brother isn't as idiotic as I thought he was." he chuckles.

America rolls his eyes and walks himself and Japan towards the open door, the other countries following behind. I feel the knife leave my neck and I drop to my knees, bawling.

"this isn't over!!" Germany yells after them in pure anger. "we'll get you back!!


	10. Chapter 10

we all file into a meeting room America reserved for us, sitting down at the small table. it's quiet for a few minutes as nobody says a word. finally the "hero" stands up and makes his way to a chalkboard, making terrible drawings of Germany and Italy.

"Okay, so we all know that our plan didn't work out like we wanted it to," he starts, setting down the rundown piece of chalk.

"Yeah because it was your bloody idea you git so I'm not really surprised." England snorts.

America shoots him a quick glare then regains his posture

"we need a new tactic, something that will really tick them off and rub it in their face that we have Japan!"

France gives off a little chuckle and sighs. "ohonhonhon don't you think you're acting a bit childish Amérique? we have no reason to brag."

"of course we have a reason to brag! we have the awesome Japan with us now!"

"oh how Prussia's going to kill you for that one aru." China mumbles, petting the panda that rests snuggly in his basket.

England sighs in annoyance, leaning back in his chair. "fine. what do you suggest?"

"well it has to be something they'll remember, something that will remind them that we hate their freakin guts!" America exclaims, tapping his finger on the blackboard at their poorly drawn faces.

"i'm pretty sure little Feli is going to remember what happened last night for life. Russia gave him quite the scare." France points out but quickly cowers away when Russia smiles at him.

"well what can we do? we need ideas!" America says.

"we can kidnap Feliciano." England suggests.

"we can spread rumors about them aru." says China.

"we can burn their house down.."

we all look to Russia to see his creepy ear to ear smile and the purple aura engulfing him. it sends shivers down my spine.

"we...we'll resort to that later- but thank you for the suggestion." America stutters, clearly freaked out

I don't like what they made me do, i'm not that kind of person. sure I can lie easily, its kind of a gift, but that doesn't mean I like to. now they probably think im a traitor or something... well technically I am one, switching off to the Allies.

why would anyone want to kidnap Italy? they end up sending him back anyways. I think everybody has already tried.

"oh c'mon dudes! somebody has to have a good Idea," America unwraps a hamburger, shoving it into his mouth with one bite. "Japan, you got any ideas broski?"

I quickly shake my head, trying to avoid causing anymore damage towards Germany and Italy. America raises an eyebrow but continues on, he obviously knows I hate being here. what I told them at their house wasn't completely a lie, they say such mean things about them..

Americas eyes light up and he swallows down another one. "what if we just terrorized them, little things at a time, then go onto a full attack?"

the other nations nod their heads in agreement.

"that might work.." England murmurs, impressed by America's theory.

"but if you do a bunch of little things to them they'll expect it." I point out, adjusting myself in my seat.

"and they won't know when. so when it actually happens, they won't be prepared and will think that it's another bothersome little thing." he replies, lifting his hands up in a heroic pose.

I sigh and lean back in my chair, closing my eyes. I don't want this to happen to them...


	11. Chapter 11

Germany's POV

________________

"alright it's all set Ludwig, just punch in the six digit code before you go to bed and its activated. if the alarms go off, our company automatically receives notice and we'll call you to make sure everything is alright." the man says, tightening a screw on the small box beside the door. "also you can watch on every room in your house from your phone, tablet, and computer!" he gives me a smile and I hand him the money, a rough $1000.

I thank him and he leaves, walking out to his truck.

I sigh and lock the door. after what happened last night I don't want anybody else breaking in. I glance over at the small Italian taking a nap on the couch, a bandaid over his neck. it was a little cut, a bit deeper than a paper cut and hardly bleeding but yet he insisted (cried) that he needed one.

I smile a little and move to the kitchen, filling my tea kettle with water and placing it on the stovetop.

I guess it will be a bit easier to see what Italy is up to and keep an eye on the house from my laptop. I have one, I just hardly use it, I prefer to do my work by paper.

as I wait for the water to boil my mind drifts off to last night. What was that all about? Italy still isn't talking because we all know for a fact that Russia wouldn't hesitate to slice open his neck if he felt like it. I don't understand what they were trying to accomplish... and what am I going to do about them? hopefully me saying that it wasn't over was enough to drive them away, I'm probably not going to do anything. it would make Italy mad, and for some odd reason I don't want that. since when have I been so caring about Italy's feelings? being appreciative is one thing but caring is another .

the kettle begins to whistle and shake, snapping me out of my thoughts. I pull a mug out of the cupboard and fill it with the scorching water and shut off the stove. I take a tea bag out of the box and dunk it in.

I should probably make one for him too. I think, taking out another mug and filling it. I place a tea bag in his and watch as they both slowly turn brown. I hear shuffling and look up to the kitchen entrance, watching as Italy slowly walks in, rubbing his eyes and yawning.

"I made some tea." I say, sliding his to the other side of the counter and taking mine in hand. he nods and picks up his mug, walking over to the table and sitting down. I follow behind and take the seat across from him. Adler trots into the room, a slight limp in his right hind leg where the tranquilizer dart hit him, right in the thigh. that must have been the thumping sound, when he hit the ground.

"So are you feeling any better?" I ask him, trying to spark up a conversation. he nods again, slowly bringing his tea to his lips. he seems so out of it now...

"Italy you need to talk. I know that scared you but it won't happen again, I promise. I won't let anyone hurt you."

he opens his mouth to speak, but no sound comes out. I can't help but notice the dark bags under his eyes, obviously he didn't get any sleep. I didn't either but I don't get much sleep anyways.

I scoot over a seat to the one next to his. he doesn't move, not even to look at me.

"please Italy, you're really starting to worry me." I'm going by what my gut is telling me. my mind always told me that I didn't care for him, I convinced myself that it was appreciation, but my heart tells me otherwise. I just don't know what it's telling me...

"I'm okay.." he whispers, turning his head in the opposite direction. I put my large hand on his shoulder sighing.

"I don't believe you."

"You should."

"but I don't."

he turns around to look at me, a small tear falling down his red cheeks. after all the times I've seen him cry, I'd think he'd be out of them.

"I'm sorry.. I'm a huge coward." he says, his breath shaking a bit.

"why would you be a coward? I mean you brought out your pistol and proved to me you're stronger than you look." I inform, squeezing his shoulder.

"but I dropped it, I should have shot them or something.."

"that's just normal you though." after I say it, I immediately regret it.

his eyes pool with more salty tears and he lets out a strangled sob. "but I don't want to be normal me!" he exclaims, throwing his head in his hands. "I want to be stronger me! I want to impress you in some way, and I don't want to be a big baby anymore! I don't want to be me...."

his words take me aback and I stare at him in shock. "Italy... you don't need to impress me. I think you're perfect, just the way you are. besides, it impressed me how you knew it was all a set up. I still don't understand it." I mentally slap myself. "that was very cheesy." I chuckle.

the corners of his mouth rise in a small smile and he stares down at his tea. "Italians like cheesy things."

I see his face grow a bit pale and his expression turns to one of nervousness though he tries to hide it.

"I- I have... something I want to confess to you..." he chokes out, looking away. I give him a confused look but he continues on. what could it possibly be?

"well, you see I... I.." he doesn't seem to be able to finish his sentence, but he doesn't have to. before I know what hit me his soft lips connect with mine. after a few seconds he pulls away, his face completely red. my heart seems to have stopped beating. he... he kissed me.

I couldn't quite process it in my head.

"...love you.." he finishes, looking away again and crossing his legs in embarrassment.

I don't have to listen to my mind anymore, that short kiss seems to have cleared the fog away. I now know my true feelings for Italy.

Italy gets up to leave after I don't respond but my hand flies out and grabs his wrist. I pull him back down in his chair and engulf him in a hug, holding his head to my chest. he grabs fist fulls of my shirt and snuggles into me, quietly weeping. it feels like a perfect fit.

"I love you too Italy."


	12. Chapter 12

Still Germany's POV

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Italy went to bed not too long ago and we're not having training tomorrow so I'm staying up. I've got some paperwork to catch up on from the past couple of days. the thing is though, I can't keep my mind on the work. memories of what happened earlier flash to the front of my brain, keeping me preoccupied from the important stuff.

accepting the fact that I have heavy feelings for Italy has really lifted a weight off my shoulders, I feel a bit more free..

I brush the papers around my desk irritated, looking for my pen, when my light blue eyes land on my laptop. I haven't told Italy about the cameras and I don't think he's noticed them. he was asleep while that guy was installing them and I haven't had time to tell him.

I should just make sure he's okay, he hasn't talk to me at all after he kissed me. I bring my hand up and cover my mouth, feeling my cheeks heat up a bit. despite my age, that was my first kiss..

I push that aside and neatly stack the papers in a pile and set them in the corner of the desk, moving to retrieve my laptop off the chair against the wall. I sit down and open it up, clicking the power button. it emits a soft hum as I wait.

he's probably just sleeping, but something could have still happened to him. I don't know what but I have a feeling he's still awake.

the home screen appears and I click on the icon for the security system. it gives me two options; lock and camera. I select camera and a grid of all the rooms in my house appear, even my study. I see myself staring at the screen. I search until I find Italy's room and I look closer.

he is still up, but he's holding something. what is it? he's sitting on his bed, his hair messy and flying up everywhere as if he had been running his hands through it. in his hands is something small and white, though I can't tell what it is.. a bottle?

he isn't smiling at all and he looks really sad. maybe I should go talk to him..

I'm about to get up and leave when I see him put something in his mouth and wash it down with the glass of water by his bed, his head tipped back. PILLS!?

what would he need pills for!?

he gets up and literally drags himself to his dresser, putting the white bottle in one of the drawers. then we goes back to his bed and crawls under the covers, turning off his lamp and putting his head in his hands. is he crying? how many pills did he take? is he...

I shake the thought from my head and continue to watch. if he was over dosing he would be doubling over in pain by now, but he's not. besides, I don't think he has the guts to do that. at least I hope he doesn't...

I wait, watching him until I'm certain he fell asleep. I close my laptop and rise from my chair, slowly walking out into the hallway. I creep through the corridors until I reach his bedroom, quietly opening his door. it creaks slightly and I cringe, carefully pushing it further until I can slip inside. the best part of training everyday is learning how to be stealthy.

I silently tiptoe to his side, observing his tear stained face. I watch the steady rise and fall of his chest, indicating that he's alive. a wave of relief washes over me. Why didn't I just check earlier? if he really did overdose he would be dead by now and I would have just sat in my study and watched him die!

I move to his dresser and open the top drawer, digging through his many pairs if Italian flag boxers. It's quite hard to see with his lights turned off and the blinds closed, he's always liked complete darkness while he sleeps though he's afraid of it. I'll never understand Catholics.

finally I reach the bottom and take out a small pill bottle. it rattles as I move it in front of my face to read the label. My hands begin to shake as the realisation hits me.

these are antidepressants... he has depression... Why didn't he tell me? isn't this something I should know about? or is he just popping pills?

I angrily shove the pills in my pocket and leave the room, not even carrying about being quiet. he doesn't wake up through anything anyways. I shut the door and go back to my study.

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Italy's POV

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I sit on my bed and watch the camera out of the corner of my eye, the red light blinking, meaning that it's turned on and being used. I was awake while the man explained it but I was faking so I wouldn't get in the way.

Why is Germany watching me? doesn't he trust me? I confess my love for him and now he's invading my privacy? maybe he's just worried about me, I haven't been talking at all. I don't want to talk.. not after last night.. I could have died..

I just guessed. I didn't even know that it was a set up. I saw a Bush rustle outside and it could have been a cat, but I guessed and it turns out it was them. It dawned on me that if I was wrong, Russia would have killed me. that fact has scared me senseless and now I won't talk.

Germany loves me and I love him.. maybe I should tell him about the pills. I gently squeeze the white bottle in my small hands. I'm just too afraid to tell him face to face. he will either get the wrong idea or he will think I'm a coward and throw them out.

Well he's watching me, and I'm in a lot of emotional pain right now, maybe I can show him. more tears slide down my cheeks as I pop open the bottle, dumping one of the pills in my hand. I throw it in my mouth and swallow it with water.

a quiet sob escapes my thin lips as I get up and put the bottle in my drawer. what will he do about this? I try not to make eye contact with the tiny camera perched up in the corner on my room as I crawl under the blankets of my bed, flicking off the lamp.

the salty drops keep falling as I close my eyes, waiting for sleep to take over my senses. maybe I do have depression... this aching pain in my chest won't go away and I'm not motivated to do anything anymore. I hardly smile and I'm crying way more than I want to. I want this pain to leave and every thing will be alright.


	13. Chapter 13

Italy's POV

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my eyes slowly flutter open when the morning light floods through the curtains. I slowly sit up and stretch my arms out, yawning.

my cheeks feel dry from all of my crying...

I pause mid yawn and my eyes go wide. What is he going to say..? my hands tremble slightly as I crawl out of bed, observing the camera. the light's not on so he's not watching. I trudge to the dresser and yank open the drawers. what if he gets mad... or did he notice?

I pull in a loose white tee shirt and head to the door. once out, I poke my head into Germany's room across the hall, hoping he may still be asleep. his bed is neatly made so obviously he's up. unlike my room Germany's is clean and tidy while mine looks as if a stampede of horses ran through it.

I sigh and make my way down the hall and through the kitchen doors. I see Germany making breakfast, placing eggs, bacon, and hashbrowns on two plates. dark bags are noticeable under his eyes, indicating that he got just about as much sleep as I did.

my breath hitches in my throat when he smiles at me, though it looks forced and I admit, scary..

"guten morgen Italy, would you like some breakfast? I've made two plates." he greets in an almost... Russia way.. it sends shivers down my spine.

I shake it off and nod, sitting down at my usual spot at the table.

"and how about a side of antidepressants with that?" he adds, the words dripping from his mouth like poison.

my body goes stiff and my expression blank. so he did find out...

he walks over and smacks the bottle on the table in front if me. I jump and I can't help the tears that start in my eyes.

"I- it's not what you think... really.."

he rolls his eyes and puts his hand on his hip, but not in a girl way.

"explain then. do you really have depression, or are you just taking them to get high? is that why your so weird all the time?"

I shake my head and stand up, angry.

"No! I'm just naturally like that! why would you think I would ever do drugs? ...don't you trust me..?" I choke out, a small sob escaping my throat.

I see his frustrated expression waver slightly, showing a small bit of sadness. he regains his composer and his face goes hard again.

"of course I trust you Italy, it just looks very suspicious when you take random pills that I don't know about.." he growls.

"I'm just taking them so I won't be scared anymore!" I shout, the salty drops now dripping. I slam my hands on the table and continue on. "dammit Germany you're making crazy assumptions again! Just sit down and I will tell you everything you want to know."

he freezes and looks at me shocked, I've never had an outburst like that before. he moves to the table and sits down in the chair next to mine, forgetting all about the food on the counter. he fiddles with his hands, indicating for me to continue and that he is listening.

I take a deep breath and start. "I went to visit the doctor about a week ago to see 

if he knew of a cure for my fear.. he says that there is no cure for ballistophobia, but antidepressants can help calm me down. at first I was just taking them for that purpose, but I realized they were helping me feel a little more happy again-"

"what do you mean happy again? haven't you been happy this entire time? I've never seen you in a very sad state, you just cry for little things.."

"... No. with this whole fiasco about Japan, you've been... almost ignoring me. I mean except for yesterday.." I give a small smile. "I'm not used to not having attention, so I feel very lonely. I started taking them more to make me feel better, even after I told myself they were only for emergencies."

I rub my hands together nervously and sit back down. It almost looks like Germany's eyes are watering but I can't exactly tell. his lips pull down in the saddest frown I've ever seen.

he sighs heavily and pulls me into his warm embrace, nuzzling his head into the crook of my neck.

"You have to remember that I'll never forget about you... Okay? I don't want you to be sad. ever." he mumbles. I nod, afraid that if I speak I'll just break down. I feel the pulse of his heart against my hand on his chest, fast and hard. (a/n: fast and hard if you know what I mean kesesese. Sorry, gotta be serious)

"You know," he continues, pulling away all too soon. "this reminds me of when you left a letter at the door of my study because you were afraid that Russia would take your place and we would forget about you. No matter what, you're still my BFF."

I nod again looking down at my hand, tracing my finger along the thin line where the cut used to be.

"an I allowed to take the pills still?" I choke out, hoping for a yes.

he rubs the bridge of his nose in thought. finally he meets my hazel eyes. remember? I'm keeping them open now so I don't miss anything else... "I guess. but only for emergencies. just use them if we're attacked or something," he sighs. "but you have to ask me before you take one and keep the bottle in that medicine cabinet." he points to the skinny cupboard beside the sink.

I give him a wide smile, half fake but half genuine. I do feel a bit better by telling him what was on my mind.. I stand up and walk to the cabinet, setting the bottle inside. I shut the small door to it and turn, but freeze when something flies past my face with a whizzing sound. the object is long and thin, sticking out of the other cupboards for plates. I glance to my right to see a hole in the window and the bushes moving again.

my expression contorts to a scared one, my heart pounding faster and faster every passing second and I scream.

Germany spins around in his chair to face me. he sees the arrow in front of me and his eyes widen. I can't believe he didn't hear the glass break.

w-were they... really tr-trying to kill me...?

he runs over and moves me to the side, his face red with rage. he rips the arrow out if the splintering wood and removes a piece of paper from it.

I don't get to see what it says when he opens it, but I can tell it isn't good when his eyes loose their shine and he frowns again. I'm not even sure if I want to... that's the second time I've almost died in the past week.

"I started something I shouldn't have..." he mumbles quietly, leaning against the counter top and for the first time, I saw a small tear slide down his cheek.


	14. Chapter 14

Japan's POV

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"alright dudes! italy was scared shitless!" America exclaims as we all walk down the dirt road to our cars.

I stay silent as ever of course, petting a cat I found along the way. probably from the labs.

it makes me sad.. Italy shouldn't be tortured like that, something was already going on because he was crying and he didn't look like he was getting a lot of sleep. did they really depend on new that much? and the note taped to the arrow is certain to stress him out. I'm not exactly sure if he's actually going to fight back, that would make Italy upset. but since when did he start caring about Italy's feelings? did what I say to him make him give Italy a bit more respect...?

"yo broski! wake up!" America snaps his fingers in my face, bringing me out of my thoughts.

"ah, sorry." I mumble and look around, realising we've reached the vehicles.

"I can give you a ride if you like, da?" Russia offers, opening the driver door the his large van.

I shake my head politely in decline and continue walking down the road again.

"but Kiku, how will you get to America's place aru?"

"I'r walk. I'm used to that anyways and rarery drive."

"nope," large arms wrap around my waist and I gasp, being thrown on a shoulder. "you're coming with me!"

America carries me to his red convertible once again and sets me down in the front seat. I turn to see China's face and his face is tinted pink slightly, a small smile on his lips. it quickly fades away and he climbs in his own car.

my heart drops slightly and I face the window.

America puts the crossbow on the back seat and hops behind the wheel.

"Hey.. you okay?" he asks.

I nod. "perfectry fine."

he hesitates, but puts a hand on my shoulder, making me feel a bit tingly. why?

"You know it's okay to feel sad about this. they were your allies and now you're against them."

I turn my head to look him in the eyes and they look... hurt. usually I would push somebody off for touching me, like Italy, but I don't want him to stop for some reason. I like the feeling of his hand on my shoulder. perhaps it reminds me of when I was a kid and China would do the same-

"hello... earth to Kiku. you there buddy? you're sure dozing off a lot." he jams the key in the ignition and follows after the other cars.

My shoulder feels cold again...

____________________

we all file into America's hallway once we reach his house and go to his living room. we take our usual spots and England immediately goes to the kitchen to make tea.

"what's our next plan?" China asks, no longer interested in this whole vandalizing scheme.

"well I think we should take a little break mon ami. every time we get together we do nothing fun, only make plans to ruin my little brother's life." France says suggestively.

he has a good point. we have done nothing as a group except fighting the axis.

"well maybe that's because we don't like each other you frogg." England grumbles from the kitchen.

France just laughs and sighs. "why won't you love me? I'm curious as to how large Big Ben actually is ohonhonhon~"

we hear a loud clatter and smash and England stomps out, soaked in tea. his bushy eyebrows furrow into an angered scowl as he grabs the Frenchman by his unbuttoned collar.

"Now listen here you bloody excuse of a gentlema-"

"calm down everyone," Russia's thick accent comes from the sofa. "I don't hate all of you, I like China."

we all glance to China nervously only to see him blushing instead of freaking out. I feel heat creep onto my own cheeks at the thought of them being an otp, it would be kinda cute. plus FrUk nearly took place a mere ten seconds before. my yaoi senses are tingling. I brush my hand over the pocket off my white uniform where I keep my small notepad for fan fiction ideas. I'll do that later.

"well we can play video-"

"No video games!" England growls, returning to the kitchen for a towel.

"well fine. I have some old board games that I played when I was younger in my bedroom closet. they've got to be ancient." he says and we all nod in agreement. maybe I can try to become closer to them so it won't be so bad being away from Germany and Italy.

he jumps up and runs up the stairs to where I'm pretty sure his room is. I wonder what he does in there on his free time...

my small blush deepens as I think some... thoughts..

stop it kiku! hold yourself together for a little while longer.

I can't deny that I have tiny feelings for the boy. although he is quite obnoxious I can't help but feel slightly attracted to him. I may be a yaoi lover but I never actually expected myself to be gay. I've read enough UsUk fan fictions to know what the little flick does, though I don't know if it's true. now wouldn't that be a discovery to find out.

his feet clomp on the steps as he comes back down, a huge stack of thin boxes carefully balanced in his arms. he sets them down on the coffee table in the middle of all of us and sorts them out. the cardboard of the boxes themselves look old and frayed but when he takes the lid off to the game Sorry, the pieces look brand new.

"You rearry take good care of your games America." I say, sitting down next to him. England comes back in and removes his stained coat. he pretends not to listen but the look on his face shows that he is slightly interested.

"well they were special to me.." he whispers and the corners of England's mouth twitch up slightly, almost too quick to be 

100% sure it happened. he sets his coat, neatly folded, onto the back of the recliner and joins us on the floor. the other nations catch on and come down too.

"let's play Sorry first okay?" England says, picking out the green pieces.

"You only like this game because you're good at it. you enjoy demolishing me!" America pouts, crossing his arms across his chest like a little boy.

"there's too many people anyways". France sighs, picking at his... manicured nails?

America points to each of us while counting, quietly muttering each number. "six"

"You didn't forget to count yourself this time did you?" England scoffs.

"No! as a matter of fact I didn't.

Well it's good to see them getting along.... UsUk May have a chance here...

"I'll play with Russia aru." China says, scooting a bit closer to the scary man. I raise my eyebrow slightly but scoot next to America.

"I'll play with him then."

America's eyes widen and he turns slightly pink but he smiles anyways, wrapping his arm around my shoulder and pulling me closer.

we play for about a half an hour and America is becoming frustrated. I can certainly tell he's a sore loser.

"SOORRYYY!!" England bellows, falling onto his back on the carpet, a very rare smile on his face.

"yeah, sorry. Sorry I'm gonna beat your asses."

we all spin around to face the door and England sits up to see a very angry German man, holding us at gun point.


	15. Chapter 15

Germany's POV

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I watch the allies as they all stare at me in shock.

"Uh.. Hey there Germany..." America stutters, a nervous chuckle following after. I hold onto the rifle in my hands tighter, causing my knuckles to turn white.

These imbeciles have the nerve to nearly shoot Italy and just go home and play boardgames... Its insulting!! They think they're better!

"Yeah. It was a bit quick huh. You didn't expect me to not react at all did you? Especially with the note you left me.." I state. My voice so calm and icy it could leave you frozen for days in terror.

"G...Germany.. You don't have to.." An Italian voice whispers, faltering a bit when he realizes I don't care. Italy stands hidden and I can probably guess shaking behind the corner.

It angers me all the more. He's scared. Because they tried to kill him.

My hands quiver in hatred as I shove one in my pocket and rip out the wadded up piece of paper. I chuck it as hard as I possible can and it hits France square in the forehead. He let's out a very girly shriek and falls over.

"YOU THINK THAT'S FUNNY DON'T YOU. YOU FIND IT FUN TO TORMENT HIM. ALL OF YOU," my voice booms, causing them to all flinch and move back towards the sofa.

"Dude chill out-"

"You say nothing to me you piece of shit," I growl, my voice deadly low. "And don't call me dude."

I watch the glint on nervousness leave his eyes and he stands up, reaching into his bomber jacket. My instincts kick in and I adjust the rifle, matching the cross hairs to his head.

"Stop moving or I'll shoot you."

"You wouldn't shoot me. Then there wouldn't be any fun left around. Besides; I'm a hero. You'll have to catch me first."

Then he was gone. Italy gasps behind me and I jerk to my right just in time to see America swipe, attempting to whack me with the butt of his pistol.

I grunt and try to keep my eyes on him but he's incredibly fast.

Verdammt...!

He tries again from behind me but this time I spin around, grasping his wrist before he gets the chance to bring the gun down on me.

Why isn't he shooting?

America's eyes grow wide and I yank the gun out of his hand and point it at him but much to my disappointment he grins. Not the reaction I was hoping for.

"You expect me to only carry one weapon with me at a time? Dude a hero is always prepared!" America exclaims and whips a six inch knife out of his jacket.

He sure talks big for such a small guy.

We keep still for several seconds, not one of us daring to move a muscle. I flick my eyes past his shoulder to look at the other nations. All huddled up by the sofa. One two three four....

Where's Russia...

America smirks at my sudden realization and-

Thwack!!

I fall to the ground limply with black spots dotting my vision. The back of my head throbs violently.

I vaguely hear Italy gasp and america messes with the blade of his knife. "Didn't even have to try.." He sighs.

"This.... I-is war.." I choke out before the world finally goes black.


	16. Chapter 16

Germany's POV

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bright rays of sunlight shine in my eyes from my bedroom window, and I hear birds chirping in the distance. a pounding takes over my head and I groan. What happened? I reach up to touch my forehead and feel thick bandages wrapped around. little hairs stick over the top of the wrap. the door creaks open and Italy walks in, holding a tray with pain relievers, orange juice and oatmeal.

"you're finally awake!" he chirps and sets the tray on the bedside table.

"how did you know I was awake?"

"I've been watching from the cameras for three days."

three days?!

I now notice the dark bags under his eyes, indicating he didn't sleep a lot. he carefully removes the wrap and lifts up my head to apply a fresh roll, tossing the red one in the trash. my head must have been bleeding a lot..

"You know, It doesn't bother me much to be around wounded people who are bleeding." he says quietly. "when Austria was at war with Prussia, I had to help the people who got hurt. because I was so little and they thought I was a girl I was basically a nurse." the corners of his mouth twitch up into a small smile. (Sorry if that's incorrect, I forgot) "and after that... the person I.. loved... had to leave.."

Italy had a love? but all he does is hit on women..

"who.. who was she?"

I see a flash of pain streak across his eyes and he frowns. he turns away and gets up.

"I've prepared you breakfast. I have to run to the market quick to get food for dinner."

before I can stop him he slips out the door. why did he dodge me question like that?

Italy's POV

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I shouldn't have just walked out like that. I mean I love him and all, I just don't know if I'm ready to tell him about Holy Rome...

maybe telling him that was a bit much, he just woke up after three days. his head is healing well from Russia's blow to the head and Japan helped me carry him home. thankfully, he's doing good.

while I haven't been watching the cameras, I've been watching the news. a "mysterious" crack in the earth ran all the way up the eastern side of his country, destroying thousands of homes. all thanks to Russia.

a chill runs up my spine at the thought that were going to be at war with the allies again. it's gonna be ww2 all over... and I don't even want to think about that.

I pull on my coat over my casual clothes since today we aren't training. I don't have to wear my uniform. I also grab Germany's keys off the hook (which he never lets me touch) and hop into his car. I run my hand over the lump in my pocket, my cell phone, and it makes me happy that I bought it. I bought one for Germany too and put it on that tray with a note explaining that it's so we can keep in touch just incase one of us gets in trouble. it makes me feel safe. the kind of safe I feel when Germany is with me... but he's not.

I drive down the gloomy streets of Germany and the people seem even more depressed than usual. usually I see men constantly taking care of their garden but with the whole crack in the country, nobody bothers. I make it to the market and step inside. it's nearly deserted in here.

"guten tag.." the only cashier open grumbles. I nervously nod and make my way to the pasta isle. there isn't much to select from but it's still good that they have pasta. but when I get to the meat isle for sausages... it nearly takes up half the store!

typical Germans..

I put everything I need into a basket and take It to the check out. the man rings it up and hands me the bag of what little I bought.

"You should be at home. I heard that the crack could spread and if it does its coming straight through town." he says uncomfortably.

I give him a warm smile and nod. he gave me a weird look that told me "you're happy about this? seriously?"

"that's not going to stop me from getting food silly. and it won't spread, I promise." and with that I walked out. as I reached his car I noticed a familiar face walking towards me.

"hola Feli! are you here taking care of Germany?"

"ciao Sp-" I pause and notice a girl walking by his side, obviously not a country. "Antonio. yes he's doing better. he just woke up today"

"good good. I heard Ivan gave him quite the whack in the head. we were just on our way to her house. Feli, meet Kaya!" he slung his arm around a beautiful girl. her dark brown hair hung down to her shoulders and her sparkling brown eyes are a bit lighter than her hair. she seems to be an inch or two shorter than Spain but she was still particularly tall.

"ciao bella! my name is Feliciano Vargas." I give her a quick peck on the cheek.

"well sorry Feli but we gotta get to her mother's place. the large crack demolished he house so we're picking her up. Kaya's letting her mother stay with her and I decided to tag along to make sure everything goes okay. adios!" They continue walking and I wave after them.

I'm about to open the car door when a certain Italian guy pokes his head from a tree.

"which way did they go stupid brother." Romano scowls.

"Oh fratello what are you-"

"that damn bastard left me at the house 'oh I'll only be a few minutes' then went to hang out with this chick! now which way!"

"th-they went that way," I say pointing left. "are you jealous?"

"just shove off idiot." he grumbles and pushes me to the side, stomping up the sidewalk mumbling something about stupid tomato eater.

even if he's mean to me, I still love my brother.

I climb into the car and return to Germany's house. when I open the door, I'm shocked to see him on the couch watching the news. his expression is very sad as he watches the lady talk about the crack and shows lots of destroyed houses.

"I should've been more careful. if I'd have looked behind my shoulder this wouldn't have happened.." he whispers but doesn't turn to look at me. I put the grocery bag on the counter and move to sit next to him.

I place my hand on his warm arm and stare at his pale face.

"you're right. you didn't have to take revenge on the allies and this wouldn't have happened. but it will all be okay. I promise."

he finally cranes his blue eyes to the side and his lips twitch, as if to fight a smile.

"you're very blunt you know."

I rest my head on his shoulder and yawn. watching on those cameras all night really kicks my butt. he wraps his arms around my waist and falls back into the couch with my head on his chest.

"You better brace yourself Italia... this is going to get serious.."


	17. Chapter 17

I'll have German translations at bottom.

TWO MONTHS LATER

Italy's POV

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The collar of my military uniform seems to squeeze tighter every time I breathe and I can't concentrate on anything Germany is saying. the main troop of soldiers, I forgot what they were called, are surrounded around a table littered with papers.

1"okay, die alliierten Truppen sind von hier nach hier umgeben, warten auf..." His thick German accent says. I can't understand what hes saying and the air seems to suffocate me further.

when did it turn out like this...?

it's painful to think that we have to be at war with Japan, he was our ally, and he was my friend. I still don't understand why he had to leave us. every time I talk to Germany about it, he won't answer truthfully, or perhaps not at all.

"Feliciano, shouldn't you be with your own troops right now." 

i gasp and look up from the spot i was concentrating on on the floor.

"ah- sorry Ludwig-"

"Commander Ludwig."

"s-sorry sir!" i pull my arm up into the best solute i can muster and he sighs.

2"ich kann nicht glauben, dass er der Oberbefehlshaber für die Italiener..." i hear a man chuckle to the guy next to him. a loud crash sounds and before i know what happened i see the man lying by the wall with the contents of the crates spilt around him. a small gash begins to ooze from his forehead.

3"Ich sehe Sie Ihrer Macht, Ihr Kopf bekommen habe. Müssen Sie nicht unsere Regel als eine Kraft erinnern? Wie über Sie Sergeant Alexander." Germany growls and points to the other man. Alexander stutters and stands up straight in solute. 

4"Immer haben Sir respektieren !"

i pull at my collar again and notice just how sweaty i am. am i really this nervous?

5"Gut, und Albrekt, ich bin bewegt Sie sich einen Rang." Germany growls and grabs onto my arm. he pulls me up from my chair in the corner and we go to the door. once we're out in the dusty field of training me he lets go.

"sorry you had to see that Italy. you're holding up a lot better than i expected, did you take those pills?"

i nod and wipe the sweat from my forehead. a sudden feeling of nausea takes over my body and i throw up under a tree.

i cough from the burning in my throat. "no i haven't yet, but I'll be fine..."

"ive never seen you this nervous before, are you sure you're alright?"

i stand up and straighten out my uniform. "si. do you think you could help me get my troops under control? they act like me and are getting out of control.."

he laughs quietly and puts his hand on my shoulder. "they are Italian. I'll be right there, I have to finish my discussion with the others."

Well this can't be good...

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"You stupid potato eater! because of your damn dispute with Japan I'm dragged into this mess! Thanks a lot douche bag." Romano growls to Germany after he gets the soldiers in order. it was quite scary actually.

"were just trying to get him back, it's for the benefit of all if us I promise you."

"sure. that or your hated for them. revenge can be a bitch, I know for myself. keep your stupid grudges to yourself and let this war be between you and the allies. let us Italians go bastard!"

our boots leave prints in the dry soil of the battlefield. it looks vaguely familiar. like the one in my dream...

my breathing becomes ridged and I start to cry. No sob. I don't want it to be like that ever! I'm never putting on a helmet again and maybe things won't turn out the way they did then, in my dream... more like nightmare.

"Italy!" "veneziano!" They yelp in unison as I fall to my knees. my throat starts to close up and I scratch frantically at my neck. blackness prickles at the corners of my eyes and I hear Romano sigh in frustration.

"I thought you stopped having panic attacks a long time ago!" They pick me up under the arms and I grab frantically at Germany's uniform shirt.

"I... can't.. breathe..!"

I don't want Germany to die... there is always that possibility and I don't want to risk it. he shot me in my nightmare, but it could easily end up him being shot instead...

"I-Italy you need to calm down! Romano, how do we help him?!"

"how the hell am I supposed to know? I lived with Spain while this was all happening. All I heard was that he had them all the time after Holy Rome disappeared." they help me to the medical tent, well basically carry me because my legs don't seem to want to function.

the darkness takes over and I can no longer feel my limbs and surroundings.

Holy Rome... Germany...

______________________________

Germany's POV

________________

Italy's face is pale, like a sheet of paper. of course I'd make that reference, I spend too much time in my study.

Italy lays still on the foldable bed, his chest light rising and falling. it looks like his breathing has returned back to normal now so I think he'll be okay. but why would he have a panic attack in the first place? maybe he's used to the medication and he's having a reaction from not taking it. it would make sense, this is war. or maybe...

"all I heard was that he had them all the time after Holy Rome disappeared"

but why? that was a very long time ago. I've heard stories but don't quite remember it myself... is that the one he loved...? Holy Rome did leave, but he never returned..

6"Sir, da Kommandant Vargas ist in der Erholung, was sollen wir über die italienischen Truppen tun? werden sie nicht zusammenarbeiten." a voice snapped me out if my thoughts. it was Alexander. I think for a moment...

I will regret this... badly.

7"Brennen Sie alle weißen Fahnen finden Sie, zusammen mit allen weißen Laken und Decken, auch all die gebrochenen Zweige gibt. Sie sind zu feige, Lager in den Wald verlassen, um mehr zu bekommen. Betrachten Sie es wie ein Bücherverbrennung."

___________________

1: okay, the Allied troops are surrounded from here to here, waiting...

2: I can't believe that he is the commander in chief for the Italians...

3: I see you've let your power get to your head, have you forgotten our rule as a force? what about you Sergeant Alexander?

4: Always have respect Sir!

5: Good, and Albrekt, I'll be moving you down a rank.

6: sir, since Commander Vargas is in recovery, what shall we do about the Italian troops? they won't cooperate.

7: Burn all the white flags you can find, along with any white sheets and blankets, also all the broken branches there. They are too cowardly to leave camp into the woods to get more. Think of it like a Book Burning.


	18. Chapter 18

Italy's POV

___________

I crane my eyes open slowly to a pounding head ache.

I notice some soldiers setting up a large tent around me and women bringing in medical boxes. the very last thing I notice is Germany's sleeping body in a chair beside me, his head laying on my lap.

What happened to me...? I have an odd feeling that things are going to be a lot different now.. like something I've lost has been right under my nose the whole time I've been searching for it. And I'm about to find it...

Germany's head turns to the side a bit as I sit up in the springy bed I'm on. the dark blue sheets are dusty, like they haven't been used for years.

What if the thing I find is going to hurt me? physically or mentally I'm sure it will hurt. but I have to remember that to every bad thing there is an up side..

"I-Italy..." Germany mumbles, still in sleep.

I didn't know he talked in his sleep.

"will you... become part of the empire with me?"

my mind goes blank. he didn't know about that... he couldn't...

my hands start to tremble and I hold back the tears.

that's not possible.... he's gone...

I place a shaking hand on his face, just like HRE used to do to me.. especially the day he left and we shared a goodbye kiss. the memory plays every once in a while as if I was there. sometimes I wish I was there so that I could make him change his mind... then he wouldn't have disappeared.

Germany smiles a soft smile and moves his hand to mine, holding it there. I can't help but let the drops fall and a sob escape. they slap onto my arm and roll down to his gloved hand.

"I have to go now... goodbye."

"No.." I cry. "don't leave me again..!"

some of the nurses that pass by give me odd looks, but they will never understand the pain buried deep in my heart.

his eyes open and he looks up at me. the light returns to his dull eyes and he sees himself holding my hand. he sits up and wipes a tear away from my face with his thumb.

"Italy, what's wrong?"

"Are you...." I choke out slowly.

"am I... What?"

"a-are you... Holy Rome..?"

his face falls and he embraces me in a hug. his arms around me feels like a warm sense of protection. like he can protect me from anything... even the past.

"I'm sorry to have to tell you but- well... HRE fell, and he's not coming back."

I squeeze my eyes closed tight and shove him away.

"I said are you the Holy Roman Empire!"

he stares at me in shock and grabs hold of my hand again. an instant feeling of guilt settles in my gut for yelling at him like that.

"Italy, I swear I'm not him. I can't be..."

"do you even have any memory of your childhood? what was it like when you were a smaller nation."

"I-I... don't-"

"exactly! so it's possible... it has to be!" I scream and hold onto the collar of his uniform, burying my face in his chest.

he doesn't respond. all he does is wrap his arms around me again and this time I don't push back.

"please don't leave me again.... capire? (understand?)

I'm sure Germany is just going to agree and move past this, but I on the other hand will never let this go. Holy Rome meant the world to me and he may or may not be back. I can't take any risks of him slipping out of my grasp like sand again.

never...


	19. Chapter 19

Japan's POV

_____________

"well we all know this war isn't going to start itself. if they aren't going to be the dumb dipshits that they are and walk over here, then we'll go over there!" America explains to the other nations, later to go tell their own troops the plans they arrange.

"ohonhon but Mon ami, wouldn't that make us the dip-"

"that doesn't matter though! you see, they have 674,594 soldiers combined. us? we have 1,547,104. whatever they throw at us, we can handle. it'll be easy!"

I see England give an impressed nod but quickly mask it away. not from my eyes of course. as always I stay completely still and silent, I don't want to give suggestions to the enemies.

I hate them! except for Alfred... I can't help but like him. I don't understand what it is though. maybe magnets get confused too; they don't know what's going on but yet they're attracted to one another.

"Kiku, buddy? you alright?" I snap my head up from the map spread across the collapsible table. America gives me an odd look and staightens out his little hat.

"hai, I'm okay." I mumble and look off to the swooshing trees next to the camp. only 10 troops from each country are actually here, the rest are waiting at base for a signal. that's not a calming thing really, if too many of us die, we send in more. it's not right... war...

"this is a ridiculous idea. why are we here anyways." England speaks up and adjusts the cuffs of his sleeves.

"Oh that is an easy one. it is because I hit Germany in the head.Da?"

nobody replies. we learned long ago to never argue with a Russian man.

"y-yeah that's right aru.." China stutters awkwardly. he's certainly got a lot of courage to be able to speak back while Russia has his aura.

"well then, when do we start this horrible plan? STOP IT YOU FROG UNHAND ME!" England screams and throws a punch at a pervy France, who apparently thinks it's okay to remove England's clothes.

"I at least want to make out with you naked, just before we die. No big deal really Angleterre ohonhon." he growls and winks. my face heats up once again at the gayness. to be honest I'm more into USUK... wait.

if fans know about Usuk and fruk... then... they know about us countries! how did I not figure this out?!

"Um.. may I speak?" I ask quietly.

America smiles. "finally the quiet one! if I hadn't known better, I'd think you were Canada."

a series of "who?"'s goes around between them in unison.

"anyways, what do you need bro?"

"werr, I just remembered. I read fan fictions onrine and-"

"What the hell it's a fan fiction?" England asks confused.

"they are stories about characters that are fiction. I read them, preferabry yaoi."

"yaoi?"

"ohonhon I know what that is Mon ami."

"of course you wourd know what that is France. but there are ones about us countries. USUK wourd be you two," I point at England and America. England blushes like a maniac and America's face contorts in confusion. "and you two are FRUK," this time France and England. England nearly gags and France puts on a menacing face. "yaoi is basicary gay ai."

"why the bloody hell are you telling us this?!"

"think about it, if there are ships for us, the mortars know about us being nations."

none of them react. "well of course they know."

"WHAT?!" I nearly shout.

"yeah dude. we're way too important for them not to know. remember when Russia jumped out of the plane and broke his back? all over the papers!" America laughs.

What the hell? this is all wrong.... I'm never wrong so they are certainly the wrong ones here.

"I don't know what you were thinking but yes they know we exist. and it does quite bother me that I'm paired up with him." England snarls and points to France, his thick eyebrows burrowing together.

USUK!

"anyways, let's get back on topic. we'll meet at 05:00 hours tomorrow morning (5:00 am) on the camp borders with our troops. each of you bring 10,000 soldiers so it's an even fight in the beginning and then we'll call in the rest of our thousands waiting off field. got it?" America orders, tapping and sliding his finger along the map.

"whatever Amérique, see you then. I have to inform my soldiers." France sighs and struts away, his white boots digging into the moist soil.

one by one we all end the meeting with a salute and walk back to our parts of the camp.

grey clouds are rolling in, there's going to be rain tomorrow. perfect for battle.

I think sarcastically and duck into my tent to my top men.

" これらは私たちが整理計画."

(these are the plans we arranged...)


	20. Chapter 20

this will be switching point of views a lot. a warning because I care. (using some The Fault In Our Stars stuff)

Italy's POV

___________

I guess I've feared oblivion my entire life. But now i know that oblivion is an inevitable thing. One day we're all going to be unaware of our surroundings or what's going on. It's going to hurt, but so does war. And I think now might be one of those oblivious times, just not in the right term.

One explosion after the next knocks our German and Italian soldiers right off their feet and leaves a loud ringing in my ears. 

my men are dying out there and I can't even move to help them... What kind of Commander am I?

"Italy! mein gott you're okay. you need to get out there!" Germany's strong accent says to my right but I don't look. I'm too petrified. this could be exactly like my dream. if I look, he'll kill me.

the rain drops around the camp heavily and I watch the soldiers slip, fall and die before my eyes.

"Can you hear me?" he asks, then groans. "It's just like before." he puts his hand on my shoulder and my knees feel like Jell-O. I'm surprised I haven't collapsed.

"here, where my helmet. you're going to get hurt like that."

-

Japan's POV

_____________

I watch my planes fly over the axis camp and drop bombs every few minutes, giving the English and French time to go in there, kill off some enemies, then get back out before the next strike.

This is almost too easy... and it slightly reminds me of Pearl Harbor. I mean because I'm the one doing the bombing. But now I feel a bit guilty about that. That's one of the reasons America and I were enemies.

I see that the Germans are picking up our hiding spot at the top of the large cliff that towers over them when they begin shooting at the dirt below me. they must see the planes head back this direction for more ammunition.

I scurry back and my white cap falls over the ledge in my attempt to get away from there bullets. I can tell they are German because they still have the courage to find and shoot the source even when they could explode. while I can hear the Italians scream. I didn't actually think I'd be at war with them this soon, but now I can't leave. and I guess I just have to accept the consequences for falling in this hole.

"That hat wasn't going to protect you anyways, wear my helmet instead." I hear an American man say behind me and a hard plastic thing wraps around my head.

"b-but what about you?" I stutter and begin to take it off.

"No keep it on. I don't want you to get hurt okay? I have an extra from a long time ago that I can use. Plus that one looks good on you." he shows his million dollar smirk that can get him any girl he wanted but I can still see the sorrow that decided to nest in his eyes. The extra helmet must mean something to him.

-

Germany's POV

________________

I move Italy and I behind a tent that's on fire and slowly -but cautiously- place my helmet on his fragile head. once again it seems to slide over his widened eyes. He tends to open them a lot more lately..

I wait for him to throw it off but surprisingly he buckles it under his chin.

"why don't you have yours." I say sternly, only because I care.

for the first time since I found him five minutes ago, he looks up at me. "I forgot."

his hands and knees are shaking wildly and I know he is scared out if his mind.

"where are your pills?"

he shrugs lightly and looks away. I guess he won't have a spaz attack, he's already too shocked. But he can't fight without those antidepressants. the only time I've seen him hold a gun was when he used them the night the Allies broke into my house.

"we need to find them then befo-"

I stop when I hear a high pitched whistling noise and my mouth shuts tight. I grab hold of Italy by the torso and run away from the tent just as it explodes. The force pushes me forward, making me fly a bit. I turn over in the air so that Italy is on top and we land hard with a loud thump and roll. my back begins to burn.

"shit!" I shout and push him off. I jump up and pull my military jacket off, throwing it to the ground and stomping out the flames.

"I forgot that was the supply tent. mostly filled with propane," I grumble and haul the Italian boy to his feet. "I'm just glad you're alright".

-

(For the first time)

America's POV

_______________

I make my way past the crowd of soldiers who haven't gone in yet and find my tent. All of the Commander in chief's have their own tent and it makes me feel bad for the soldiers who sleep on the muddy soil while it rains. But there's no mercy in war.

I step in and spot the old helmet resting on the small table. Yes the old helmet. The one I wore while on the battlefield in the late 1700's against the old man. I usually keep it with me in war to remind me of my independence, it helps me feel unstoppable.

and that's the one thing a hero needs to be: unstoppable.

It's most definitely old, almost 300 years old and I'm not sure if it will survive. it seems sturdy enough.

I smile to myself as I slide it over my head. alright! it still fits perfectly!

though it isn't the safest, it will have to do. and it's kinda embarrassing. it has a weird broom bristle type thing on the top. like seriously, I could sweep my house with it. it reminds me of the helmets that the Spartans had in that movie 300.

I slide the strap beneath my chin and step out. receiving odd looks from the others, I walk back towards Japan with a blooming plan. I've used it before, and I think it just might work.

-

Italy's POV

___________

"we need to go help our fighters out there, they are fighting without a plan and its chaotic. we're going to lose if we don't help." he grabs onto my right arm while I clutch my rifle in the other, though I've forgotten how to use it. he pulls me back towards the explosions.

I can already see that he's going to be protecting me more than I'm ever going to help him now, but I still need to make sure that he doesn't get hurt. He could possibly be Holy Rome, and I can't just let that slide.

It's dawned on me that I was never strong for Germany, even when I thought I was. it was the medicine doing all the work for me. I want to be truly strong. even if it's not a lot, I want to prove to him that I am really truly powerful. I defeated Turkey when I was just little, so why can't I do anything useful now? is it because my big brothers made me feel weak?

I tighten my grip on the rifle and jerk my arm away from Germany. He looks shocked but quickly spins me around to face him.

"I understand that whatever you were thinking has made you determined, but perhaps you're over estimating yourself? please be careful okay?" he says. another bomb is dropped nearby and it shakes the ground.

I nod slowly and almost every ounce of courage I had gathered up, drained slowly out my feet and into the mud. I bring my hand up to slick back the strands of his wet blond hair that are loose and a tear slips down my cheek. the corners if my mouth twitch up at the realization if how much he really looks like HRE.

he places his gloved hand behind my neck, tilting my head up slightly before bringing his lips down to mine gently. we move slowly in sync in our soft but passionate kiss. it feels so right and I never want it to end but the rain hitting our heads and the men shouting bring us both back to reality. we know that you can never stay in the clouds.

he pulls away and smiles a little at me, which is rare, he hardly ever smiles. but it falls and he looks back at the soldiers, laying bloody in the rain and being trampled on by others.

"try your best. I heard you took down Turkey once".

-

Japan's POV

_____________

I load one bullet after another into my machine gun slowly, dreading the fact that I actually have to shoot the axis soldiers. they worked with me once.

America shows up on the other side of the table I'm at with a weird looking hat on, like the Spartans that Greece told me about. I could see England watching from afar too and giving America a pained look. isn't he supposed to be down there fighting?

"okay so I have a plan," he says determinedly. "I need you to use this gun here instead and just this one bullet. I know you're an excellent shot so I'm not worried." (I'm not naming the gun because I can't think of one. use your imagination.)

"why?" I set down the machine gun and inspect the bullet carefully. "and I'm not that great of a shot."

"the Russians and Chinese have switched with the English and the French so I took Iggy aside and had him put a curse on that bullet. It makes it to where even a country can't heal from it until the bullet is removed, and then it's a normal human healing process so it would take a long time."

my stomach drops. so I'm supposed to shoot a country... that's Germany or...

"I want you to shoot Italy. it will throw Germany off guard just enough for us to win easily. it's not even noon and were obviously dominating."

No... I can't shoot him. he's just a little... well, Italy. this may be America telling me to do it, but I'm not so easily going to be trampled on.

he sees my angered face and his becomes sad.

"I know this is hard for you, but you need to move on. you're with us now and some if us really care about you..." he scratches the back if his head nervously.

I relax a little but not enough to be noticeable. "What do you mean?"

he awkwardly shuffles over to me and stops. "well I mean like, haha, I kinda well, like you Kiku. a lot." his face heats up a shade if pink simular to the cherry blossoms back home during spring. he looks everywhere but at my eyes and I can't help but grin a little. he actually likes me. now that's something I didn't expect.

"You probably don't return the feelings but-"

"I do. I rike you too America..." It's a lot easier to confess when he did first.

I guess I can do it. I will hit him somewhere where it isn't lethal and maybe it will be over soon. America isn't stepping on me, he's including me while noting my potential.

I sigh and pick up the gun, slipping the shiny gold bullet inside the barrel.

he looks over at me shocked but let's me pass.

"w-wait Kiku!"

I turn around and gasp as he smashes his mouth to mine. I don't know what to do at first but I slowly melt into the kiss, letting it happen. he's actually a very good kisser and I'm just happy that China was too busy fighting to see this. somewhere I hear England cursing something about "that bloody wanker has no right to wear..." but I wasn't listening. before we went any farther, I pulled away, a small bridge of saliva connecting our lips.

"You don't have to do this... I can pick somebody else." he says quietly.

but I turn away and drop to a crawl towards the edge of the cliff so I'm not spotted. I can feel the beat of my heart picking up speed every passing second as I prepare myself. I have to do this, for the sake of the war.

I prop my elbow up and hold the gun to my shoulder, bringing my eye to the scope attached. it's okay kiku, calm down. I find Italy and Germany standing by the tents, and Germany seems to be telling Italy something. I aim carefully towards Italy's shoulder, just praying that he doesn't move, but he was a statue. I flick the safety off and slowly count in my head.

3...

2...

1...

I slowly and carefully pulled the trigger.


	21. Chapter 21

Italy's POV

___________

my eyes widen and I stagger back, moving my hand to my shoulder. the sharp piercing stab throbs, but why can't I do anything about it? I remove my hands to see thick redness paint my fingers.

"Italy? what's wrong?" Germany turns and scowls as his eyes lay on my shoulder. "tch. you've been shot... let me see." I can tell he's trying to stay calm but his voice wavers and cracks.

my eyes pool with sudden tears at the pain and I open my mouth, letting a loud sob escape.

"I-I can't move m-my shoulder..! It hurts Doitsu.. h-help me..!" I wail. he gives me a pained look, as if he didn't know what to do, and gently picks me up bridal style. I cant help the tears once again for the thousandth time during this battle. Its inevitable, just like oblivion. 

"I-its okay Feliciano, you're going to be alright." he strains. Even through my extreme pain and blurry vision i can see that this is hard on him. but i don't know why. he's not the one who was shot. 

is it because he loves me...?

The intense throbs that send shock waves to my brain keep me from continuing my thoughts about that and i cry out. 

He sends me worried looks every few seconds while he carries me to the medical tent.

I try to hold consciousness but the blackness prickles at the corners of my eyes and slowly i fall limp in his hold.

i just hope he'll be okay...

______

sorry, POV change.

Germany's POV

________________

why was he the one that had to be shot... He's barely done anything. Sure he can be super annoying but he didn't deserve to be hurt like this! 

anger rises in my system and i cant help but feel rage for whoever did this to him. I don't care if it was somebody from our side caught in the confusion. They will PAY.

Italy's eyes close slowly and then i feel all his weight. For a moment, i panic, thinking he died. But then i realize a blow to the shoulder isn't like getting shot in the head. Plus he's a country. He doesn't die easily. He probably just passed out...

I push through the flaps of the large medical tent that Italy was in not too long ago. Now he gets to be in it again. It's packed with dying and wounded soldiers and i worry there wont be enough room for him, But a nurse with a few blood stains on her apron comes and takes him from my arms.

"I'm sorry Commander Beilschmidt," Her Italian accent spoke calmly. Though i could hear the panic in her voice now that their own Commander was down. "there isn't enough room for you to be in here." 

More nurses push past with motionless bodies and i realize that i cant stay. I have troops to lead and i cant let this small injury get to my head. I knew this was going to hurt me as much as it hurt him because he bawled with a cut, but i always thought he'd be shot by Switzerland.

"Sir, please. he's in good hands here and we'll report to you his condition." she says, picking him up the way I did, making me realize that I was staring at wounded people.

 

"e-excuse me.." I quickly turn. she was pretty, like, really pretty. now I understand why Italians always hit on women. but now isn't the time, and... I love Italy.. I just wish she would let me stay so I can watch him.

I sprint out of the tent and dodge the path of an incoming patient. I need to help my-

another explosion nearly knocks me off my feet once again and I just pray to God that a bomb doesn't strike the tent.

whoever is sending these bombs, I don't care which country it is, will die. they will die a slow and painful death for hurting my pride, my country, and my Italy.

I stand on top a pile of crates and am about to blow my whistle to gather all of the fighters together for a quick plan, just to keep order, when a different whistle goes off. the sound of boots against splashing mud through the thick downpour echoes and I notice the explosions come to a halt. the footsteps fade away.

soon the smoke begins to clear a bit. only the smoke from fires remaining.

Only a rough estimate of 300,000 soldiers remain standing, bloody and torn. that's about half of the soldiers we started with. My head throbs from the loud noises and just plain frustration.

A normal person would think it's over, we've been dominated and we're going to lose. might as well just surrender.

But that's not the case at all. This isn't over. in fact, far from it. Nobody hurts my Italy and gets away with it alive.. I'll work our remaining troops to the core so we're ready for the next attack, and hopefully, we'll be the ones doing the attacking!

a small man with dark brown hair and an awkward curl sticking out stomps up to me. if scowls could kill, I'd be dead. his uniform is ripped and his face covered in dirt.

"What the hell was that you bastard! we're out there fighting off the Chinese and Russians and French and British and those other son of a bitches and you're just standing here like some super hero or something watching us get devoured! you could've at least helped us a little! you're turning into that snotty American, just sitting back and doing nothing. You know-"

"actually I was doing something. Saving your brother." I say back. this guy really pisses me off. Romano's pointed finger curls back and his scowl falters.

"wh-what happened to Veneziano..?"

"he was hit, shot in the shoulder. he should be okay though. if they can remove the bullet, he will heal in a few days. but there is the chance of fragments if the bullet shattered-"

"shut up jackass! I don't want to hear the details, I know this for myself!"

I sigh and rub the bridge of my nose which has become a stress habit. why did I have to mouth off to the Allies? why am I so bad with grudges and revenge? if only I had listened to Italy all the times he complained of my temper and mouthyness, then this might not have happened.

I flick my eyes around the muddy field, large holes now indent the ground and is littered with more bodies. the ones who are still alive will have time to heal while the others are training. I just have to keep in consideration that they don't heal like us nations.

pain and guilt fills my gut at the sight of the dirty soldiers trudging around and lifting up their dead comrades. it reminds me of the Holocaust... the Jews really didn't do anything wrong but everybody, including myself, was brainwashed by the Führer... the people out there dead and dragging their bodies around are like the prisoners in the concentration camps...

"let's help them..." I whisper and head to the field, Romano following. I let the rain slick my hair down into my face to add to my misery and trying to keep my mind off the fact that Italy is probably awake and crying.

and I'm not allowed to be there with him.


	22. Chapter 22

Germany's POV

_____________

We managed to extinguish the remaining fires. They were mean and some wouldn't go out, but we managed. Romano was up my ass complaining about how i let his "Fratello" get hurt, following me around like a shadow. He's also the Commander-in-chief for the Italians (for he is also Italy) but he wouldn't leave me alone long enough to help his own men, so i did everything for him.

"I heard you have like a super sense or something so why the hell didn't you dive in front of him. I'd much rather you were shot than-"

"Romano, don't you have people to help." I snap sharply, turning to face him from the half burning tent. He scoffs and walks away, muttering not-so to himself about how much of a douche bag i was, his hands flailing everywhere like they do when Italians talk. 

I do feel bad that i couldn't help Italy. I do wish i had a super sense. and i do wish i could have dove in front him. But that's not what happened, and i can't change the past.

If i could, i would change history, starting from the beginning of 1940... maybe life would be better. And i could save Italy.

I finish extinguishing the fire and head back to the medical tent. It's been a few hours and the soldiers have started setting up new tents, some are even coming back from the nurses in just a sling or crutches... others are in a pile by the tent. i choose to ignore that part and walk in. It's still crowded inside and nurses scurry from patient to patient to treat them. My stomach churns when i see shadows through curtains, obvious amputations.

"We aren't as busy as before, you may see him Commander Beilschmidt." The same pretty nurse from before said, walking up to me. Her long brown hair hung over her shoulders and in front of her even more bloodstained apron. I nod and she leads me to the back.

wounded heads turn to watch me pass but something is different. They look angry. As i walk past one of my top men i hear him whisper "You should have helped us..."

My heart sinks a bit, but it's not like i haven't heard it all before. But my heart really sinks to my feet when we stop in front of Italy's bed. His eyes are blood shot from crying and he lays there with his head propped roughly on a pillow, staring at one of the other nurses as she works. He flicks those blood shot eyes to us and he lazily smiles. 

"Hya thr Luddy-Duddy, Hws it ot thr...? ya kickn' thr asses??" He slurs violently and sucks a string of saliva back into his mouth like a drunken man, and being German, i know exactly how that is. I've never seen him like this before. Sure he drinks but he's never actually gotten drunk for as long as I've known him.

"He's a bit loopy from the anesthetics we gave him. We'll continue to give him doses until we can get around to inspecting his shoulder further. He was crying violently when he woke up so we had to drug him. From what we know, the bullet penetrated just under his collarbone, but the impact managed to fracture it. The bullet, fortunately, didn't shatter. With his healing abilities he'll heal quickly, being a country and all. All is well!" she chirps lightly and walks off. she sure is happy for someone helping dying people.

i force a smile at Italy, to be friendly. but in all honesty, it's hard looking at his pale sickly face.

"h-how are you Italy? are you feeling o-okay?" i ask and kneel by his bed.

" 'm graaand Lddy. ya see tht wman 'ver thr? she's a kper 'ight thr!" He exclaims and points at the nurse who's replacing bandages around a man's bleeding head. He then falls into a fit of flirtatious giggles. 

i crack a real smile for half a second and move my hand to his, receiving weird looks again. I know my past was racist and anti-gay but my country has changed. I'm just really confused... I'm not completely gay, just Italy.. That's acceptable i hope.

"Ja, she is pretty."

" 'RE YA CHTIN' 'N MEH?!" he screams, sounding a lot like a pirate on drugs.

"wh-what? no why would i-"

"oky jst chckin'."

Mein Gott... He's bipolar.

It seems that everyone in the tent looks at us like we're crazy but i ignore them. I just know that Italy is alive. Even if he is retarded. Not that he wasn't before.

"Ya knw, I thnk i cann tok nrmlly nw. 'sall goood." He says, still slurring. "i rlly mssed ya Hly Rme, i spnt sooooooooo long watin' fr ya to cme bck, bt ya nver did ya knw?"

why is he calling me Holy Rome? Is he on about this again? I was thinking about it after he broke down yesterday. Could it be possible that i really am Holy Rome? I've heard history about him, but he vanished. But yet again, i still don't remember my childhood. Prussia wont tell me about it either, he said i have to wait until I'm older. I AM OLDER! HOW MUCH OLDER DO I HAVE TO GET FOR SOME STUPID CHILDHOOD INFORMATION?!

 

" iz jst nt fair tht ya hd to leave meh lony lke tht.. iz nt rght."

"i-i didnt mean to leave you, i had to." i reply, going along with it to make him happy. "it's just-"

"hy 'm knda hngry. d' theh hve 'ny pzza?"

once again. cutting me off.

Italy's eyes begin to droop and i realize the medicine is taking over. i slowly stand and take my hand back.

"you know ill just go get you some pizza and have the nurses give it to you when you wake up okay? I'll visit you tomorrow."

he nods and his head rests on left shoulder, his eyes closed. i smile and start to walk away. i stop a nurse who doesn't seem to be doing anything and ask her politely to give him a slice of pizza i bring by later. She nodded and smiled, picking up a clip board from a table.

walking out of the tent was actually quite a relief. sure it looks small on the outside, but it's pretty big on the inside. the fresh air was nice, but stenches of bodies and smoke. if i go back inside, ill only be overwhelmed of sanitary smell. I cant go anywhere...

i sigh and head back to my own tent for a bit of rest, then ill drop off the pizza.

i just hope my country doesn't hate me, Romano has a point. I didn't do anything to help them and half of them died. will we have enough for the next blow?


	23. Chapter 23

Italy's POV

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It's been three days since I was shot. I'm not really sure why I'm thinking this, I just want to take a few moments to go over my life a little. maybe it's one of those weird things called a mid life crisis that the older countries went through and normal people do too. I've never actually had one but I am quite old I suppose. my appearance is 21 so I look a little young for one of those but I'm really over 2,000 years old (I think). big brother Romano usually keeps track of that kind of thing.

I want to do a bit more deciding for myself now. All these nurses are doing everything for me when I still have my other arm. Germany visits me everyday and also helps them help me. maybe I should go see him today!

"ah! excuse me bella," I say, grabbing onto a pretty nurse's hand. "am I allowed to leave for a walk yet?"

she smiles kindly at me and I smile back, showing I'm fully dosed on pain meds and not hurting.

"alright fine, but only because you called me beautiful. be careful out there okay?" she pulls a sling out of a box to my right and balances my arm in the rest, draping the strap around my shoulders. "they're training so stay close to the tents and off the track."

I nod excitedly and jump out of the sheets, a feeling of nausea taking over for a split second.

"woah slow down there buddy, gonna make yourself pass out. take it easy." she held my good shoulder to steady me. I guess I'm not used to standing after three days of sitting around.

It makes me feel good that for once somebody isn't praising me for something i don't deserve. This nurse isn't calling me commander-in-chief or anything. I didn't want or earn the title commander-in-chief, it just kinda came with my duty of being a nation.

"Ve~ bella? what's your name?" i ask out of blunt curiosity. The nurse looks extremely familiar... i just can't put my finger on it.

"Oh yeah I've met you before Italy. My name is Kaya remember? Spain helped me move my mother's stuff," She chuckles lightly. "It's really funny how you two don't think i know. everybody knows about the countries."

I feel my mind go completely blank. I really am spacey aren't I? I seriously thought we were a secret. why didn't anyone tell me...!? I mentally facepalm myself for my retardedness and grimace.

"go on, go see Germany." she urges and gently nudges me towards the tent entrance.

Giggling with a slight wave i leave, but only to be met with the smell of smoke, gross military food, and dirt. Most of the soldiers are running laps and the obstacle course the Germans set up. Looks Difficult.

As i walk along the path that winds in front of all the tents, i receive odd looks and snickers from the others. What did i ever do wrong? I was merely in the medical tent and i wanted to take a walk. Of course I'm used to this kind of thing, the looks of disappointment. my entire life I've been trying to be strong like everybody else but it's never gotten me anywhere... being myself just makes things worse.

I wish Holy Rome was here to protect me.

I don't realise I'm spaced out until I bump into something. or someone.

grimacing, I grip my shoulder and flick my caramel brown eyes up. What I see is two men, tall and very well built, adorning the green German uniforms.

"ah, scusate. I didn't see you there." I smile politely and try to move around them but they move with me.

"well if it isn't the itty bitty Italian boy," the tallest one sneers, speaking good English. it surprises me because most of them speak German. "so. why aren't you training noodle arms."

"Oh w-well my shoulder is-"

"You do realize exactly how weak you are right? most of those soldiers were nearly killed fighting a few days ago and they're still using their limbs to climb and run. why aren't you? you've only been shot!" The shorter one shouts, cackling hysterically.

Germany... Where are you?! Wait a minute... this could be my chance!

"You have no right to speak to the Italian Commander-In-Chief in that manner, when you're obviously so low in rank." i say as nonchalantly as possible, waving my good hand to indicate the small amount of badges on their uniform. What am i saying... these guys are huge! I barely have the right kind of training to lead this role so who am i to say these things?!

"You don't deserve it. You were chosen by God to be a country but you're not a very good one. The only reason your country hasn't fallen is because you formed an alliance with Germany."

i begin to walk past them as they speak but freeze. If i had become part of the Holy Roman Empire... would he still be here with me? But HRE is Germany right? So he is here with me... The confused thoughts bring salty tears to the corners of my eyes. they just don't understand. I need to find Germany, he's the only person at this point who can make me smile a genuinely real smile.

"stop." I command, my voice wavering slightly involuntary.

"little boy scared?"

"please. I asked politely so please leave me alone."

I avoid making eye contact with them but don't move.

"why? we're only telling you what you need to know so you don't get ripped apart." they snicker unconvincingly.

"I SAID SHUT THE FUCK UP!" I snap, the tears flowing at a steady pace. "I'M SICK AND TIRED OF BEING USED AND VERBALLY ABUSED BY ASSHOLES LIKE YOU. LIKE YOU GIVE A RAT'S ASS ABOUT MY SAFETY, IF YOU DID, WE WOULDN'T BE HAVING THIS CONVERSATION NOW WOULD WE. JUST BECAUSE I'M NOT AS STRONG AND BIG AS GERMANY DOESN'T MEAN I'M A WEAKLING. I WILL NOT DIE IN THIS BATTLE AND LET ME GET ONE THING INTO THE SPACE BETWEEN YOUR EARS: YOU WILL NOT BE THE DEATH OF ME."

my breathing comes out in large puffs, full of anger. that's it. I'm done with idiots. I may be an idiot, but I'm not going to ever stop down to their level. someone needs to teach them respect.

being brothers with Romano certainly pays off, I've learned a few things.

they blink, staring in disbelief. "um yeah. sure.." swapping glances before walking off.

I can feel my face, warm with heat. I hate to curse, I really do. but sometimes I just can't tolerate the crap people throw at me...

I inhale and exhale slowly, calming myself a bit before continuing to Germany's tent. I should probably report to him how they were acting. he can get them back in Aline.

the grey clouds give the camp a very depressing look. maybe the sun can't tolerate them either and is hiding away.

after lots of searching, I find the tent with a big German flag sticking out of the top. the tents are fairly big so it was difficult to find.

I lift the flap and walk in, lucky nobody else is here to hear me rant. Germany is bent over a table, examining a map underneath a lantern. I watch carefully as the light flickers over the shiny illuminated paper, waiting for him to notice me. when I figure he's not going to, I clear my throat professionally, staightening up.

"Germany, please talk to a couple soldiers of yours. they were being very disrespectful to me."

he looks up from the map, raising an eyebrow. a couple stands of his hair fell forward and he slicked them back into place.

"um.. sure. do you have names or descriptions?"

"there was a short one and a tall one, both blond."

"you're going to have to go into more detail than that Italy, we're all blond here. are you alright? you're acting really out of character lately. do you want to talk?" he motioned to the second chair next to him but I should my head no.

"Yeah I'm perfectly fine. normal day just standing up for myself and telling the meany pants' out there just how shitty they are." I snarl with as much sarcasm as I can muster. those losers ruined my day.

"I would question if you are Romano in disguise but you called them meany pants'. I'm sure it's you Italy."

"are you going to talk to them or not."

"er.. Yeah. I will. Italy I think you need to calm down a bit, is this battle to much for you to handle?"

I look away. "I can handle it fine, I just wanted to let you know how mean your soldiers are to me."

I turn to leave the tent, basically forgetting why I wanted to visit him in the first place.

"Hey wait just a second. Italy what's wrong, seriously you're not acting your happy self..." he grabs onto my hand to keep me there. I stop but I don't pull my hand away.

"It's okay Germany, I don't need to talk.

he spins me around to face him, his narrow blue eyes completely serious. "do you remember this?" he holds up my hand and locks our pinkies together. "our friendship and love. it was our deal; when you're in trouble, I swoop in to save you. and when I'm in trouble, you're my cannon fodder. we trust each other. please don't cry Italy."

am I crying...?

the drops tickle my lips, finally letting me know they are there. I try to breath slowly, to stop the crying, but it turns into a long sob. why did he have to bring up the past? it was a happy day, the day we sealed our alliance and friendship. I didn't think he remembered... too bad us nations CAN'T forget.

"I don't need to talk!" I yank my hand away and start towards the exit but he pulls me back.

"Italy! what is wrong with you? this doesn't make any sense to me, I'm trying to be caring and sincere here but you're not complying. I don't know how to do this so you're lucky in doing it at all."

"Well then don't do it anymore. I don't need you or your sincerity. I can manage myself on my own and you know what? maybe they were right. maybe my country only stands because I formed an alliance with you, but I want to prove them wrong. I can survive without you saving me!"

a pang of guilt flashes through my chest for saying that and the sudden pain in his eyes only made it worse.

"Italia... who did this to you?"

"you're people. all they've been is a pain in my ass and I don't want to deal with it any more."

stop. stop Italy. you're ruining it for the both of you.

"my people are perfectly fine! there is nothing wrong with my country! we're perfect!"

"Well your "perfection" killed millions of people including mine. let it sink in."

No.. I'm still doing it. why am I trying to be the bigger man here?

the expression on Germany's face contorted into something I'm all too familiar with. a mixture of anger and slight pain. before I knew it, his hand came crashing down on my face, leaving my cheek stinging.

"that drew the line Italy. that's a new low for you to bring up my past."

the tears stop along with my brain and my body seems to cease its functioning. he... slapped me. he actually did that. I know I deserve it but I didn't expect him to do it.

his face changes from rage to apologetic and he reaches out to lay a hand on my shoulder but I back away, afraid of him touching me again.

"I-Italy, I didn't mean to-"

"No. I understand. I went to far, I was trying to be the bigger man." I turn away, carefully skimming my fingers over my currently swelling cheek. it was only a slap but it was hard. I must be in shock again like when I was shot, it came as a huge surprise.

"please I-" but I was already outside. I don't want to here the rest and lucky me; he isn't following.

________________

Germany's POV

________________

What have I done... he's never going to forgive me now. I snap when somebody brings up WWII and all the terrible things I was brainwashed into doing. but I never wanted to hit Italy. ever. I love him so much it hurts and I don't even know what I'm doing anymore. What is he doing to me...?


	24. Chapter 24

Germany's POV  
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"this is great news commander Beilschmidt!" The messenger boy Otto exclaims happily, rushing into my tent. It may be good but i don't think whatever it is is going to be enough to fill the empty gap in my heart. I'm still angry with myself about what i did to Italy yesterday...

"What is it Otto?"

The boy, no older than 19, slips a paper out of a wrinkled yellow envelope and hands it to me, a look of excitement adorning his face.

upon reading my eyes widen. 400,000 men have volunteered to be in the military?! were going to have 400,000 more men just in the Germans! I wonder how many Italians...? surprisingly a lot of Italians are strong, depends on the person i guess.

"this... this is great Otto!" I grin slightly, showing that I'm happy we still have a chance.

"I just delivered a report to Commanders Lovino and Feliciano Vargas, they have 300,500 new recruits also! that's 700,500 more soldiers!!"

"Otto, have all the new recruits sent over immediately, both German and Italian. we'll train them here." I order.

"Yes sir!" Otto turns and exits the tent. I let my grin fade. Where have these people been...? we've lost so many already.

_____________________  
¤TIME SKIP¤  
_____________________

"CHEERS!" the sound of a hundred drinking glasses clinking together rings in the ears. the men decided to celebrate huh? even the seriously injured people in the medical tent got a glass.

"c'mon Luddy! Cm'ave a drnk with meh!" I here a familiar drunkman. I'll just ignore him, I won't be able to face him after yesterday!

I move around the crowd to the table set up at the back, a chunky man with a beard hands me my drink.

"danke..."

"pleeeese ludster! whre are yeh?" his voice seems to be getting closer.

I need to think if a way to fix this, make things right again. Well I can try now, he's drunk, and obviously he wants to be with me. I sigh and walk out of the large tent. if I'm going to talk to him it's not going to be in there.

I sit down outside the tent they used for the celebration, the assembly tent, and set down my glass. it's the largest, almost the size of a circus tent, and we just use it if we need to discuss something important with everyone.

a feeling of nausea settles in my stomach. What am I gonna do... What am I gonna say..?! I haven't seen him drunk in a while and I don't know if he's going to be mad at me or anything! I regret what I did and I can't run away from my problems, I need to solve them!

I pull out the cell phone I hardly ever use and dial Prussia's number. it rings for a while but he picks up.

"whaaat what do you want."

"Gil I need your advise on something."

"sure but make it quick, Birdie's here."

I raise an eyebrow. "who's birdie?"

"why doesn't anyone know who I am...?" a faint voice says on the other end.

"I do, I know who you are!" Gilbert replies. "so what's the problem?"

"You see...Italy's having an emotional breakdown and yesterday we were arguing and well... he brought up my past."

there's silence on the other end and for a second i think he hung up, but then he speaks. "oh shit. what happened after that?"

"w... well. I slapped him. And i regret it completely because he's already injured and the doctor told me that since were countries our bodies should easily eject the bullet but somethings wrong and the bullet isn't letting Italy heal properly and he'll be stuck in this condition until they can remove it." 

There. I spilled everything that's bothering me. I know that it's hard for me to tell people what's on my mind but i finally did it and hopefully he can help me.

"And why do you need my awesome advise?"

"I- uh... I want you to tell me how to fix this..."

"OHHH WEEESSTTTT I KNOW WHATS GOING ON HERE! YOU NEVER STUTTER!"

"W-What?"

"I think you've gotten yourself a one-way ticket on the looveee traaaiinnnn..." He made sure to exaggerate the end a bit. "and i, your awesome brother, will also double as your awesome conductor! WOO WOOO!"

"Ja... i know."

"WHAT?! YOU ALREADY KNEW? AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME THIS WHY?!"

"Um, yeah i guess i didn't- anyways, can you tell me what to do? i really need your help here!"

"alright so what is he doing now? sleeping? eating? masturbating? what is he doing at this very moment."

"why would i know if he's... masturbating. That's disgusting!

"just tell me! i haven't got all day!"

"he's drunk."

Should i have told him he's drunk? knowing Gil he's going to suggest something completely inappropriate. No wonder he and France got along pretty well.

"Oh he's drunk? PERFECT! I know exactly-"

"OOHHH DOITSUUUUU WHRE R YOUUUU?"

"traurig (sorry) Gil, He's coming!"

"haha that's what you'll say when-" 

I snap my phone shut and stand up to face him, only to turn around and walk in the other direction.

"Lddy whut are you doin you hve ta beeee wth meeeee."

I can hear his staggering footsteps follow aimlessly behind me. what AM i doing? i thought i told myself to face my problems not run away from them. and I left my beer over there..

I speed walk into my tent and zip up the entrance, hoping to block him for a little while longer.

I cant run forever, it wouldn't work! i need to make at least an attempt to fix it, even if it's lousy! i reminded him of our promise yesterday... do i need to remind myself?

I hear the zipper and turn to see him stagger in. He's drunk but he's not stupid. Tears start to stream down his face at a rapid pace, like rivers.

"I'm really sorry for the way i was acting yesterday Ludwig! It was messed up of me to bring up your past, we all have our faults and i also know that it doesn't feel good to have that happen by the person you love."

What happened to his slur? He's acting... back to his normal self again.

"I-Italy...?!"

"I want to make it up to you..."

______________

(im switching to 3rd person, i mean, its awkward to write certain scenes in 1st.)

___________________________

Italy walked over to Germany, the staggering almost completely gone. He placed his hands on Germany's chest and lightly pushed him, causing him to fall back onto his bed.

"Italy...? what are you-"

the Italian boy crawled onto the foldable bed and up Germany's body, until they were face to face.

"Italy I can't do this with you- please get off" Germany pleaded, but he denied the fact that he wanted it. Italy smirked and smashed their lips together, trying to arouse a reaction out of him, but the German didn't comply. he could feel his face heat up intensely.

"I-I thought you were drunk Italia!" he said once he pried himself away. Italy moved his lips from Germany's mouth to his ear, whispering as seductively as possible:

"nobody stays drunk forever you know..."

Germany's already red blush grew even hotter. he wasn't drunk anymore? then why would he do this? wasn't Italy mad at him?  
if he does turn out to be drunk, and Germany had done something like this with him, it wouldn't turn out really well, but there was still that fact that he might be sober. plus he did apologize...

after a moment of debating, Germany smiled a crooked smile and placed his hands on Italy's waist, flipping them over so that he was on top.

Italy's expression showed one of surprise and lust. Germany dove in for another kiss, this one being passionate and not forced. their lips seemed to melt together in a warm way and Germany really liked it.

he licked along Italy's bottom lip, asking for entrance, which Italy granted, opening his mouth for Germany to explore.

they fought for dominance, their tongues twisting in a somewhat dance. Italy let out a throaty moan and that only turned Germany on. he wanted more. he wanted to see all of Italy. not just the weak, hopeless tomato box fairy, but the real him. he wanted to see his body, and not have Italy cover himself up. he didn't want Italy to be insecure, because Germany loved him for who he was, no matter how many scars he had.

Germany broke away, kissing lightly along his jaw-line, ending up at his ear. mocking the same seductive tone, Germany purred:

"there's a small rule of mine that I always take top..."

Germany heard Italy gasp slightly as he nibbled lightly on the shell of his ear.

"OH NO YOU DON'T!" (switching back)

I (Germany) gasp and turn my head to the entrance. I know that angry Italian voice anywhere.

"you know I was looking for my brother because of how distressed he was and I couldn't find him! I though he went and killed himself over you! but no I find him here drunk, underneath YOU potato loving bastard!" Romano rages, stomping over to the bed. I go completely pale with embarrassment...

he tries to pry me off of Italy but I don't budge so I give in and sit up.

"I BET YOU GOT HIM DRUNK SO YOU COULD DO THIS! MY BROTHER MAY BE STUPID AND VULNERABLE BUT HE WOULDN'T DO THIS WITH YOU!"

Italy props himself up on his elbows and frowns, clearly upset we were interrupted.

"No fratello, I'm not drunk. I did choose to do this," he hesitated slightly. "I love Germany and there's nothing you can do about that!"

"ohonhonhon I knew it!" a certain Frenchman chuckles from the corner of the tent.

I jump up, putting my revolver from its holster.

"What the hell are you doing in here!? get out before I KILL YOU."

France rises from his hiding spot and slowly walks to the center, hands in the air.

"I was merely sent as a spy, nothing more. I'll leave you now so you can continue in this filthy nest of love."

he ejected something from his sleeve and before I could pull the trigger France threw it on the ground. a bright flashing light blinds us all along with a cloud of smoke. once it clears, I sigh in defeat. he was gone.

that nasty pervert.


	25. Chapter 25

Japan's POV

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"NOOOOOOOOOOO!"

a shrill screech sounds from the tent in the middle of the grounds, the tent painted with the American flag on the side..

why does everything start with him? he's the leader though he shouldn't be, his tent is the first one you see, and every chapter in my point of view starts with America. What an attention whore.

I can't stay mad at him for long of course... he's America. everything about him is annoying and admirable at the same time, which is irritating!

my fingers graze over my thin lips, thinking about the kiss. I decide to ignore it. he exaggerates everything. he probably dropped his heart attack on a bun.

I put on a small smile, continuing my lunch in my tent in peace. the only disturbance is the soldiers running their laps, shouting, and-

"Um, Japan, I think you need to come with me." a British accent says from the tent entrance. I internally grumble in annoyance and look at England, my expression once again blank.

"hai, give me a moment to crean up."

"It's actually quite urgent, it seems the axis have more recruits."

a pang of excitement goes off in my chest. they have a chance... they have a chance!

"how many?"

"America would like to explain it to all of us at once, he ordered me to come get- hey! why the bloody hell am I doing what you're telling me!" he shouts angrily to the American's tent next door. his obnoxious laugh booms from the tent. England sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose.

"just come. we're all waiting."

I nod and rise from the floor, following him out. we walk into America's tent to see everyone else waiting.

"Ha! I actually got you to do something for me!" America exclaims, pointing his finger at England.

"I didn't do it for you you wanker! I did it because he was still next door and didn't come over here!"

"if only you listened to me like that back- ...." America trails off, pain glistening in his eyes showing he didn't intend for it to take that turn.

England stayed quiet for a second but then spoke up. "I wasn't the one not listening. why couldn't you just follow simple orders like a good boy? never mind it doesn't matter, keep your stupid indepen-" he suddenly pauses and we wait for something to happen. his face grow pale and he quickly pulls out his handkerchief, coughing into it violently. when he pulls away all we see is blood.

"s-sorry, happens every once in a while." he chokes out.

we all go silent, wondering who will speak first. an odd feeling fills the small somewhat room and I glance at Russia, seeing the terrifying purple aura radiate around him. the smile never leaving his face.

"I'm glad to see you're all getting along."

"y...Yeah." America stutters quietly before clearing his throat. "alright changing matters; I called you all here to discuss a problem. a big problem. the axis have new recruits, our spy knows this before they do. Germany and Italy were just informed and their soldiers want to celebrate. the recruits will be sent in tomorrow. the day after that is the day I say we strike!"

"Well how many aru?"

"our spy said about 700,500... they're getting powerful. but we need to win. not just to keep Japan, but for the glory of our nations. we defeated them once, we can do it again!"

to keep me? I thought I was stuck here..

I raise my hand slightly and America quickly nods, telling me to continue.

"What do you mean to keep me?"

America's face falls and everyone else looks around nonchalantly, they know.

"hehe did I say that out loud? ha I guess I did well you see I kind of made a deal...with Germany, saying that whoever wins gets to have you. Sorry..."

my face flushes with heat.

"Kiku, calm down. you need to stay calm aru." China says wearily.

are you kidding me? I know I have a chance of going back to the axis now, but I thought he liked me! he's passing me back and forth like a toddler's toy!

"I thought you riked me, obviousry you don't want to keep me." I say, my voice calm. I may look peaceful but I'm burning inside. the countries look shocked, looking from me to America.

except for France. "ohonhonhon I knew it. I can feel the sexual tension from here!"

America glares at him sharply, but France just continues on.

"anyway I have to go, the sun is nearly set.

"where the hell do you think you're going?! the meeting isn't over yet!" England yells angrily.

France moves swiftly to the tent entrance. "somewhere." is all he says before exiting, the tail of his purple uniform gliding behind him.

__________________

Germany's POV *the next day*

__________________

I plop down in my chair with a huff. inspection is pretty hard sometimes. just like every war, a few females sneaked in. when we had our countries put up flyers for new recruits, we asked for no females specifically. not to be sexest but girls do tend to be weaker.

(A/n: I don't really think so, I am a girl haha)

"So Doitsu!" an enthusiastic Italian accent says behind me, causing me to almost fall out of my chair. when did he get here?!

"y-yes Vargas?" I stutter, a bit shaken up from the jump scare and the memories of what happened last night. it brings a small blush to my face in both hotness and embarrassment. Romano won't talk to me. and how did France even get here? past the guards and security?

"It's hot when you call me by my last name Beilschmidt." Italy whispers in my ear. I keep my face turned away so he won't see my blush growing bigger. "wanna continue what was interrupted...?"

he's changed... a lot. he isn't the weak Italy I know, he's different now. he seems to be bursting with courage, especially in... sexual... situations. but the minute he sees a gun, my helmet, or even England, he shrieks and freaks out. he has refused to put on my helmet ever since he was shot because it basically confirmed his fear of wearing it. I don't like this side if Italy, he's more dominant than before and it gives me the impression that I can't protect him anymore. but I have to protect him with my life, I just don't know what I'd do if he died.

"Italy... I can't. I'm sorry but we're at war."

"So you're going to let me die a virgin?"

"What...? no- what are you saying...? you're not going to die!" my voice rises in anger and I whip around to face him. "WHY would you think you're going to..."

he's so... pale... his face is an almost complete white, nearly drained of every drop of color. deep dark circles rest underneath his slightly sunken eyes. he looks so miserable. and his arm. thickly wrapped in bandages.

"I'm not healing."

"b-but you're a country... you have to heal! shouldn't your body eject the bullet after a few days and heal quickly? I admit, it's been a while, three weeks, but you have to heal. you have to."

"the bullet isn't ejecting and its blocking my healing process. my wound is infected badly and I have a 75% chance of..."

"...of what." I have a pretty good idea of what it is but I can't bring myself to believe it.

"d-d... dying!"

he caved in, falling in a fit of tears. "I-I'M GOING TO DIE LUDWIG! I'M GOING TO DIE AND EVERY O-ONE WILL FORGET I E-EXISTED JUST LIKE HOLY ROME! WHEN I WAS SHOT I-IT FELT LIKE REALITY FINALLY SHOWED ITSELF T-TO ME. IT-TRIED TO BE STRONG ABOUT IT BUT NOOOOO I JUST HAD TO BREAK!"

I let him vent. he seems to need it a lot. picking him up in my arms, I gently begin to hum a song I've known for as long as I remember. I used to hum it to myself all the time because it always brightened up my day but I don't know why.

Italy quickly calms down, now only a small pile of hiccups.

after who knows how long we stayed like that, with his head rested on my chest, he spoke.

"that song sounded familiar."

tears are forming in my eyes and I don't hold them back. he is dying for God's sake. I let them roll down my cheeks silently.

"I've known that my whole life. beautiful isn't it? like your eyes, but you never open them. why is that?"

"because the world is cruel. I don't like to watch the world around me crumble to ruins right before my eyes because it's too much to bear. there are so many people, so many people, that I don't want to see the world without. they're gone now. but I truly believe they're in a better place. mortal and immoral love is painful, because eventually we all die. but we die with a story. I wanted my story to end with those people in it but that isn't going to happen. I feel like my story is paused when I keep my eyes closed, so it doesn't have to continue. but when I'm around you, I want to open my eyes. I want to continue my story with you, but I fear the same result. pain and loneliness."

I don't know how to respond for a minute, registering all he had to say.

"but you can. if you do die, you'll keep your eyes open until the end, because I will be there with you. that's how your story will end. but you won't die, I won't let you..."

Italy lifts his head up and looks at me, slowly opening his caramel brown eyes. those beautiful eyes.

"Ti Amo Doitsu..."

I pull him in for a soft, passionate kiss, the chilly coldness of his chapped lips make me shiver slightly. he is so cold he feels dead.

"ich liebe dich Italia."

_______________

Italy lay in his bed unconscious, a machine connected beside him. they want me to remove it, the bullet. in not sure if I can...! I've healed my own bullet wounds but I've never removed somebody else's. damn doctors, they don't have enough time to remove it themselves...

I sigh quietly and grasp his hand, cold to the touch.

"I have to go, I have an important phone call to make."

I leave the medical tent and whip out my mobile phone, scrolling through the A's in my contact list. I click the person in looking for and hold the phone up to my ear.

ringing.... ringing... "hallo?"

"Austria, I must ask you of a favor."

"ja what is it Germany, I'm actually quite busy at the moment."

"Well.. it's Italy. he was injured in battle and the bullet in his shoulder isn't an ordinary bullet. it's not letting him heal properly and they can't get around to removing it, it's become very very infected and now... he has a ... 75% chance of dying.

can he stay with you and seek emergency medical attention from a hospital?"

a long silence occurs as neither of them speak. when Austria finally says something however his voice is pained.

"I'm very sorry Germany but I cannot get involved with this battle. I understand how crucial this is but if I keep him here at my house, the allies will start on me also. I'm in enough trouble as it is and I can't afford anymore. terribly sorry.

"but please...! he can't stay here, there is always a chance of the allies striking and what if they strike the medical tent..?! he'll be gone for sure!"

"best of luck... goodbye.."

"No- wait!"

a long monotonous beep on the other end tells me he hung up. that bastard!

What am I going to do now...?


	26. Chapter 26

Japan's POV

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"Kiku I- I didn't know it was going to kill him! England n-never mentioned anything about that...!" America exclaims apologetically. China and I were talking... sort of... when America barged in, laying out the news about Italy and his physical condition.

"Werr maybe me should put a burret in you." I mutter under my breath just loud enough for China to hear, causing him to widen his eyes.

"is he dead yet." I continue, still facing the opposite direction from the American. I can't believe he made me shoot him... poor Italy. I knew there was a curse on the bullet but I didn't think it would kill him.

"n-not yet. he's close though. the military doctors estimated around two more days of living. they have him hooked up to machines and all that robotic stuff too. they want Germany to remove the bullet but Germany can't do it."

"then osorerimasu (I am sorry) I have to skip training tonight, and arso, kirr off the pran of attacking."

America's face contorted in confusion. "but-"

"just do it."

__________________

Italy's POV

__________________

"I'm sorry Feli... I can't do it. I- I can't remove your bullet...!" Germany sobs, his hand entwined with mine on my injured arm. multiple tears roll silently down his cheeks and I use my other hand to wipe them away. Germany lets his head fall into my hand slightly and I slick his messy hair back.

in a raspy voice I answer. "there is no need to apologize for anything. You've saved me too many times to count and I'm extremely grateful for that, you've done more than enough to make me happy. I've loved you for a while now and I'm happy I get to be by your side until the end. can you hand me that glass of wine?"

Germany smiles a little through his tears, handing me the glass from the bedside table. "I can't believe you're drinking wine, you should be drinking water."

I take a sip, licking my chapped lips and handing it back. "living life!"

"yeah."

"ve~"

"signature sound.."

"huh?"

"You always make that noise when you're happy, does it mean anything in Italian?"

"not really. it's just something we say."

there's a long pause between us as nobody decides to speak. I look around my old room. to the dresser that holds my small emergency gun, to the Italian and German flags hanging side by side on the wall. the military doctors said that if Germany wasn't going to remove the bullet, there wasn't any hope for me. the bullet's in too deep and it would take a surgical procedure to take it out and for some odd reason they think that a country can do it better. they told Germany to move me here for capacity reasons.

"I'm not going to lie, I'm a bit scared to die. I don't know what it's like. but I'll except it if it comes, and you'll be right beside me. maybe it's my time, and I'll be able to see Holy Rome again."

I can see the pain in his eyes. it hurts him every time I mention Holy Rome.

"Italy... who is Holy Rome?"

I close my eyes tiredly. "a boy I loved a very long time ago. at first he was my bully, but then things changed. he had to leave to battle one day and I gave him my push broom," I smile and a salty drop rolls down my face. "he promised he'd come back but he never did. I waited everyday for him at the exact gates he left at and made sweets with miss Hungary for him. I finally faced the truth not too long ago that he's gone."

Germany exhales deeply and looks at the flags on the wall.

"You need to rest alright? You look very exhausted."

I nod and he stands up, heading for the door.

"wait- can you sleep with me tonight?" I ask quietly, already laying down.

he stares at me for a moment before complying and switching off the light. using the sliver of moonlight shining in my window I watch him undress to his boxers and tank top. he slides into my bed, careful not to hurt me.

I curl up in a small ball at his side and I immediately fall asleep with his head rested on mine.

____________

my eyes slowly flutter open to a soft thud but I'm too weak to look up. my room is still dark, telling me that its probably past 1 in the morning. I feel a small pinch in the side of my neck and I gasp quietly but I don't fight back.

whoever it is in the room with me I feel very comfortable around and nobody would bother assassinating me anyways, I'm dying already. I feel that whoever is here is trying to help me.

I hear the light jingle of clanking metal and see a blurry blob of black hair before my eyes droop closed once again.


	27. Chapter 27

Italy's POV

__________

"...taly... Italy..!" Germany's voice breaks through my consciousness.

i squirm slightly in protest. 

"It's too earlyyyy.." 

"Italy your arm! mein gott boy get up and look!"

I crane my eyes open slowly. ....What is he talking about...?

Realization strikes me about as fast as the bullet that hit me. 

The person last night, were they helping me? Black hair... but there are many countries with black hair. I know it's not germany because germany wont remove it and he's a blonde so who was it?

I sit up slowly, slightly wincing to the sharp pain in my shoulder. 

I feel... healthy..

"Italia... Youre going to be okay!" Germany exclaimed in a deep, groggy voice, his hair messed up. He cupped my face lightly in his hand and brought his lips to mine in a slow sweet kiss. My mind fogged up in confusion and from the kiss. What's going on..? He pulled away and embraced me in a hug, aware and careful of my shoulder... that is now wrapped with fresh bandages. Somebody was here to help me!

"Germany, let me see it." I giggle lightly, a smile plastered on my face.

he holds onto me tighter and I feel him shake his head no.

"you really scared me you know that?"

I stay silent. knowing exactly what he's talking about. he was happy a second ago but now he's suddenly changed.

"I really thought you were going to die... if you had, I'd never be able to live with myself for the fact that I couldn't help you even though I had the chance. I'm a coward Italy.. I'm sorry."

"Germany you don't have to be sorry. I was going to embrace it and let go but I would be with you the entire time. I'd go happy!!" I give him my best smile but when he pulls back to look at me the smile is not returned. his expression is pained.

I'm not helping him am i...?

"That's not going to change anything... I'm still a Dummkopf.."

"Germany please-"

"nein, I'm not worth it.."

"Doitsu-"

"Please don't call me that.."

"GERMANY LISTEN TO ME FOR TWO SECONDS."

The quivering German falls silent from his mumbling tantrum and his blue eyes fall to the white bed sheets.

"You can't go on about how you're not worth it when if that were really true i wouldn't be here. You've saved me more times than i can count and for one little mess up you say you're not worth it?! It makes absolutely no sense to me and it makes me feel like i'm not enough to keep you happy sometimes. I'm trying my hardest with my heart of hearts to make you happy but you always turn around and say these kinds of things. You saved me...! not physically, but mentally. If i had never met you, i would have given up. I know that i cant kill myself but i already felt like i was dead with my extreme amount of loneliness.... please... stop being this way and cheer up a little! I'm right here. I'm not dead. And it's because of you."

He stayed silent but after a moments hesitation, wrapped his arms around me once more. The spreading feeling of attention and protection make me feel at ease from my very small rampage.

"You couldn't be more right... I'm sorry Italy.."

"There. Glad I can be of service and knock some sense into ya!"

Germany pulls away and stares at my shoulder, his hands still trembling. He hesitantly unclamps the end of the gauze wrap, peeling it off my arm like an apple.

A warm smile twitches at the corners of his mouth.

"Thank Gott..."

I look down at it quickly at the notification that it was a good thing.

My shoulder has a long cut that's held together by thin perfect stitches. Its purple and orange and nearly every color of the rainbow.

"Its disgusting." I state, smiling myself.

"Its beautiful. It means you'll live. How do you feel?"

My headaches gone and my fractured collarbone is healed and-..."

"Italy what is it?"

"I..."

Sudden panic floods through me and my eyes widen. Tears dot the rim of my eyes.

He senses my fear and gets a bit frantic. "I'm serious spit it out." Though he didn't mean it in a mean way.

"I can't move my arm."

"Huh?"

"I said I can't move my arm...!!!"

A small sob escapes my lips and I glance around frantically, attempting to calm myself down by looking at my stuff. Clogging your mind with good memories sometimes helps in times like this.

Its no different right? I couldn't move my arm before... Maybe its just an after effect to the numbing stuff.

"Can you feel anything with it." Germany demands, taking my hand in his. I see him moving each of my fingers individually but I feel nothing.

"No.. Maybe its the medicine-"

"Its not. Trust me I know."

It feels as though a knife has been lodged in my heart. How would he know...? I've never heard any war from before we joined forces.. He's gotten hurt before that's a no brainer, like when Russia whacked him, but I don't know any others.

"How do you know?" I finally build up the courage to ask.

He stays quiet for a couple moments and when it looks like he's examining my fingers, I can see his eyes are really looking at something else.

"You remember world war two, all the terrible things I did." He finally says. "I lost a lot of my people in that time and it was my fault. The dramatic loss of population had a toll on my body as well, parts and limbs would go numb. Your shoulder. When you got shot... It killed a lot of people."

My bottom lip trembles in disbelief.  
It did...?

He rushes to explain. "I didn't want to tell you because you were hurt and that's not necessarily healthy and I made Romano promise not to tell either so he knows and yeah."

"But..."

"I'm sorry for not telling you sooner Italia..."

"I had the right to know. Why the hell didn't you tell me?! I understand I was sick and all, but if it concerns my country, I need to know."

"But Romano had it covered..."

"Fratello has everything covered! He does everything for me! I need something to happen so I can prove my responsibility and you keep taking away the possibilities!"

I see the immense pain flash through his widened sky blue eyes and I instantly regret it.

"I didn't mean that Doitsu..." 

"No I know, its alright Italy. I've taken quite a few opportunities from you and I'm sorry." He gives me a small smile and continues. "I promise I'll let you take them from now on."

"Grazie. But I think we should worry about my arm."

"You'll be fine, you're population is increasing again and you'll be able to feel it soon."

I wrap my good arm around him in a hug and he smiles a bit. "I'll go make us breakfast and I have to pack up."

"Wha... What do you mean..?"

"I have to go back... Our troops need me."


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about my shitty smut writing skills haha

Germany's POV

________________

I set the plate of sizzling sausages and bacon on the table and took a seat on one of the few worn out chairs I still own. I've had to sell lots of my belongings to acquire enough money for this battle. I feel more powerful than before with all the new recruits but there's a deep achy feeling inside and I know we're slipping.

my heart drops every time I watch him attempt to move his fingers or arm as a whole but it won't budge.

he bought it... not very many citizens died when he was shot, not as many as I made it seem and certainly not enough to make him go numb. while making breakfast I came to the conclusion that some of the magic from that bullet is still in his system, especially where it remained in one spot the longest. it seems that it's still pumping in his blood stream.

Italy catches me staring and smiles, it's warm but not very convincing. he's worried...

"don't look so scared, your arm will get better in no time."

"that's not what I'm worried about Doitsu.." his smile fades a little and he pokes and prods at his sausages. he gives a little chuckle. "No never mind. you'll win this."

I catch that he's talking about the battle and smile kindly. "I'll win it for you Feli." 

I smile on the outside but I burn with rage on the inside. my soul feels as if it's on fire and I clench my fists underneath the table. the thought that someone nearly killed Italy is infuriating, I don't care who the fuck it is but when I find them they're dead meat.

"What are we..?" Italy says after a couple minutes of silence, the only noise being my angered thoughts. they seem to fade and become a low buzz within my brain when his soft voice speaks like honey dripping off his tongue.

"um... countries?"

"No I mean our relationship. we've kissed a few times and we almost... um.. anyways it's just so confusing to me.."

we've nearly had sex and we've confessed our love to each other, does this make us lovers?

I moved across the table and sat next to him. I took his small, cold hand in mine. "Feliciano... I really really love you. to an extent where it's scary. when you're in trouble, I'll swoop in and save you. but... when I'm in trouble, will you be my cannon fodder?"

Italy's eyes widened and tears sprung from the corners. he adjusted our hands and connected out pinkies together.

"always!"

I hugged him closely, entwining my fingers in the hairs on the back of his head. I make sure to place his ear above my heart so he can hear how nervous I am about what I'm about to say.

"remember when we almost had sex but your brother and France interrupted us?" I say a bit too bluntly, feeling Italy shiver at the words.

"and I said I always top?" he nods feebly and his hands start to tremble.

"Well I lied. I'm still a virgin Italy. I have no experience in that kind of thing. you were also my first kiss.. so.. even if I don't have the right experience, will you trust me and we can.. you know... try again?

he's still for a moment and my heart beats wildly. I think it might burst... please say yes... you're the only thing I want to touch, want to hold, the only thing I want...

Italy's head nods against my shoulder and a warm tingling sensation floods through my body.

"uh.. I.. want to take this slow.. so I don't hurt you." I mutter into the crook of his neck.

Italy pulls away from the hug and our lips meet for a short kiss. "okay".

I entwine our fingers, our fingers that fit so well together like a puzzle, and walk us to the stairs.

__

I lead him into my bedroom and let go of his hand, slipping my shirt over my head and tossing it in the hamper. Italy's cheeks burst with color and he looks away embarrassed. his working, shaking hand attempting to unbutton his own shirt brings a smirk to my lips.

"here, let me do that for you." I chuckle and undo each individual button slowly. he begins to fiddle with his pocket and his forehead starts to sweat. he's anxious.

I finish the last button and grip his collar, pulling him into my body. our lips collide and I immediately melt into the kiss, Italy quickly tries to lick at my lips, practically begging for entrance and I desperately want to give in. I leave kisses along his jaw line and bring my lips to his ear.

"let's take it slow." I whisper, lightly tugging at the shell of his ear with my teeth and I hear his breath escape his mouth.

with a sudden burst of courage I push him lightly back onto my bed, just like he did when he wanted to make me tea. my mouth never leaves his neck, biting and sucking.

the soft whispers that leave his lips send shivers down my spine...

__________________________

Italy's POV

____________

Germany's soft, thin lips graze at my neck, leaving the skin tingling.

this isn't the same sensation as before, I was so lost in my lusty craze last time I barely felt any pleasure... I like it better this way.

his teeth wisp down my throat and he kisses softly at my collar bone. one of his fingers swipe across my left nipple, causing my back to arch and a noise I've never made before come out of my mouth.

Germany stops and looks up at my face, a shocked expression plastered on his own. I slap my hand over my mouth and look away, avoiding eye contact. then I feel something hard press against my thigh. my eyes widen and I slowly gaze at Germany. his cheeks flood red and he smiles.

"I'm gonna try to make that noise come out of you more often."

without warning he rolls my nipple between his thumb and index finger while taking the other in his mouth. my mouth opens on its own to let out a moan but I hold it back. I'm too embarrassed to let it out.

little squeaks force their way through when he flicks his tongue on it.

"I'm gonna have to take my pants off soon Italy." he mumbles against my chest and I shiver.

"let- me..." I groan and he sits up. I crawl to his pants and unbutton them slowly. not meaning to tease but I can only use one arm. I get them undone and gasp a bit. the straining bulge in his boxers is huge and I can only imagine how big he really is.

I build up my courage and lick the bulge through his boxers. a choking noise comes from his throat and he looks down.

"I-Italy no I won't be able to-"

"shh. let me have my fun" I smirk and lick it again teasingly. I play with the hem and slowly pull them down with loads of patience, though the German doesn't seem to have any of it.

a little, barely audible sigh of relief comes from his lips as his member springs free. my brown eyes grow big and my heart nearly stops. he's huge.

I swallow down my nervousness and touch the tip. my hand begins to tremble and I grasp it, slowly starting to stroke.

"A-ah.."

my strokes quickly progress into pumps and Germany's legs start to shake.

"take I-it in your m-mouth"

"what?" I ask nervously, even though I heard him clearly.

"please.."

I nod. if I'm already this far I guess all I can do is move forward. I kiss the tip gingerly and lick down the side, leaving small kisses. I make my way back to the top and start to take it into my mouth. I only make it have way without gagging but Germany doesn't seem to care.

throaty groans and my slurping noises fill the silence around us. I suck and lick on his member like I've seen in some of Germany's hidden dirty movies. he doesn't know I've seen them of course.

my own cock starts to grow hard from the noises and just by the thought of the situation.

I decide to experiment and start humming deep in my throat. Germany throws his head back and grabs onto my hair causing me to moan lightly. hair pulling is a kink of mine...

I feel him twitch in my mouth and he pulls himself out.

"no, not yet"

I nod and he pulls his pants off, throwing them carelessly onto the floor along with my own. I cover myself up, realizing how much smaller I am compared to him.

"don't hide yourself Italy, I want to see every bit of you, inside and out.

"you won't like it though..."

"I love everything about you and I'm sure it's- uh.. beautiful..?

I giggle at his attempt and move my hands away.

"I love it." he kisses my forehead lovingly. "now if we are going to do this properly get under the blankets."

"sì.."

I move under the soft fabric and he climbs in after me, positioning himself above. he reached into the drawer in the bedside table, pulling out cinnamon flavored lube.

I raise my eyebrow at the choice in scent.

"it reminds me of cinnamon buns okay? a dark and bruding man can't like his sweets or something?" he smiles, trying to comfort me. he knows I'm nervous about this. he must be able to hear my heart beat or something.

he snaps it open and squirts a little into his hand, then it disappears under the covers.

"put your legs on my shoulders." he orders and I comply. I whine a little because I'm not the most flexible person in the world.

"wait where is your han-" I shriek in surprise as he rubs the lube at my entrance. "that's cold!"

he chuckles lightly, slowly inserting a finger. I groan in protest. he begins to pump his finger and I gasp. it's kinda pleasurable actually..

"o-ouch Doitsu!" I say when he pushes in another.

"hey calm down, just relax."

"but that h-hurts..!"

"only for a second you just have to get used to it, relax a little okay? you can trust me."

I do as I'm told and try to relax but it's a bit uncomfortable. my skin is stretching and it hurts but I try to anyways because he says it'll make the pain go away.

he pumps the two fingers and after a few seconds I adjust to it. His fingers hit my prostate and i buck my hips in pleasure.

"hn~ ah~!" I moan aloud. I don't care if he hears me anymore. the feeling of need for more intensifies and I start to push myself onto his fingers. "m-more~!"

little tear droplets sit at the brim of my closed eyes.

he adds a third and I moan louder. my hands travel up my chest and I begin to rub my hard nipples.

my eyes slowly open and I pout a little when he takes out his fingers.

"why'd you s-stop?"

his cheeks are flushed red, probably because of my performance. "You're- um ready."

he grabs hold of my hips and pushes himself inside. I gasp and grab at the bed sheets. He's much bigger than his fingers.

"relax Italy- verdammt you're so tight- hn..! I just loosened you up."

my legs slip down to his waist, and I cling onto his shoulder in a death grip with my good hand.

the pain only lasts for a few seconds before I become used to it and I wrap my arm around his neck. "you can move now" I whisper into his ear.

he slowly draws out, then rams back in, rocking my body into the headboard. "Ah!"

he repeats, over and over again and I cling on tighter. loud moans tumble out of my mouth and I can't seem to control them.

"h-harder..! Germany!"

he grabs onto the headboard and shoves himself in. hard. I unlatch myself and fall onto the bed, letting him rock himself into me. I feel an explosion of sudden pleasure and I cry out when he hits it. "Germany!! Ah- right there..! keep going!!"

he rams his member onto that same spot repeatedly and I fist the sheets.

I begin to feel hot and a twisting feeling starts to form in my stomach.

"ger-Germany... I'm close.."

"...me too.. hold on a bit longer.."

the knot grows bigger and I don't know if I can wait. I hold it back as much as possible and Germany leans down. mumbling in my ear "three... two... one..!"

I feel him release all his cum into my body with a moan and I let go as well. I cry out as the waves of pleasure practically blind me. my arched back slowly falls and I lay there, panting like a dog. Germany slowly pulls out and plops down next to me.

"that was fun" I whisper out of breath.

"ja. it was." I open my eyes and turn my head to see Germany. his chest rising and falling rapidly but slowly calming down and his hair is really messy. he looks over to me and smiles. a truly genuine smile that melts my heart.

"Ti Amo."

"Ich Liebe Dich."

Germany's arms wrap around me and pull my body into his, giving me warm comfort.

"I was scared at first, when I saw how big you were. but you've shown me that there isn't anything to be afraid of. thank you." I smile warmly. I wait for a response but don't get one and then I notice his deep, steady breaths. he fell asleep.


	30. Chapter 30

Japan's POV

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sure he was annoying... but I would never be able to live with myself if I killed him. he was like family. if I can deal with south Korea then I can deal with him. I removed the bullet... but did it work? I don't know what kind of spell England put of that thing.

I feel a hand grasp my shoulder lightly and I blink, coming out of my trance. China walks from behind me and sits in the chair on the opposite side of the card table. he irritates me. I want to make amends with him... but I can't.

"how are you feeling?"

I remain silent.

"I understand how you feel aru.."

"no you don't.."

"oh really? you think I don't? how young you think I am?"

the corners if my mouth twitch up a bit.

"hai I guess you are right, you have seen rots die in you're day."

"one didn't even die.. but still lost him."

"who?"

China stares down at his hands, picking at his nails. "nobody.. doesn't matter anyway"

is he talking about... me?

"I can't rive with myserf for what I've done China"

I can't let him know I was helping them and removed it...

"I know aru, we all make mistakes like this."

"America, he- he tricked me... he doesn't rike me at all.."

"that not true aru," China whispers just barely audible to my ears. "believe or not, he is going through same thing."

"nani?" (what?)

__________________________

England's POV (for the first time XD)

_______________

every word spilling out of America's mouth is like a punch to the gut, though I'll never admit that.

"but what if I've ruined it. any chance of being with him... it's probably gone.. I really lo-like him!"

but I love you you ignorant git... Why can't you see that!

tears well up suddenly and without my consent and I blink them back.

"I'm sure he likes you too America, you just need to talk to him" my voice cracks a bit but he doesn't seem to notice.

"but I've already apologized to him!"

"no, I mean about your feelings, you need to make it clear to him that you love him!"

America removes his glasses and wipes them on his shirt, and for the first time I realize he's crying.

he inhales deeply and stares at his glasses though I'm sure they're blurry.

"I'm just scared..."

my eyes widen a little and I flick my green eyes to the dusty old helmet sitting on a small table, held together with super glue and occasional clear packing tape. I know exactly how you feel.

I don't notice that I've moved in front of the young American boy until my hands are on his shoulders.

the bloody hell am I doing...?

"England what are you-"

I don't stop myself, leaning forward I lightly press my thin lips to his plump ones. I realize what I'm doing and whip open my eyes. I let go of his shoulders and back away slowly, afraid of what I've done. he'll never trust me again, he loves Japan and I just kissed him!

how selfish am I..!?

America's face remains in the same shocked state for about a minute and I grow worried. well, even more worried than I already am.

his...perfect..lips part- no! stop that! his lips part and his eyes begin to water.

"now I understand.."

"A-Alfred I'm so sorry I didn't mean-"

"but you did. thank you."

"I knew you wouldn't like me anymore I'm a disgrace to gentlemen natu- wait what?"

"I realize these feelings...!" his face lights up and he wipes away the tears. jumping to his feet he putting on a silly grin and spreading his arms and legs out like a starfish.

"I love you England!"

"WHAT THE BLOODY HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT. ONE MINUTE YOU'RE CRYING ABOUT JAPAN AND NOW YOU'RE SAYING YOU LOVE ME. talk about bipolar..."

he lowers his arms and extends his hand to me. "maybe you should sit down."

I nod slowly, taking a seat on his squeaky fold out bed.

"please explain to me what goes on in that odd brain of yours.."

as he thinks of how to start, he begins to pace the tent.

"so, for a long time, I've been getting this achy feeling in my chest. I don't know what it was. but now I do-"

"didn't. know what it was."

"excuse me, Mr. walking dictionary. anyways, as I was sayin', I know what it is now. for a minute, it was like reality was crashing down on me. I love you Arthur!"

I blink.

does he really...? but he loves Kiku

"uh- America, that doesn't help. I still don't know what you're talking about."

he scratches the back of his head nervously and looks of to the side.

"well it was the need for affection I suppose. I needed to feel loved and I didn't know why I felt it around you, but when you kissed me, I just knew. at first I kissed Japan so he would shoot Italy-"

"how dare you I raised you differently!"

"but then I got to thinking; what if Japan can fill this gap in my heart. so I honestly thought I loved Japan, but in reality he was just a replacement!"

America plasters his goofy smile on his face again but I scowl. I know I should be happy that he feels the same way, but he can't just play his heart like that.

"you asshat! you can't just string Japan along like a fish! he really loves you, what do you think he'll do? how will he react? but these thoughts never crossed your mind did they? nooooo they certainly did not! because gosh diddly darn everything is fine again!" I exclaim loudly, throwing my hands in the air.

I watch through angered eyes as his expression falters.

"I don't know how to tell him England.. how do I?"

"don't ask me, git." I look away, trying to hide me pain. it hurts me to say these things out loud.

he's just naive... he'll learn. he's forever the age 19 but that doesn't stop him from learning and getting hurt and learning from his mistakes.

the tent flap opens and a young American man walks in.

"uh, sorry to interrupt anything, but here's a message from the general. hey bro are you doing okay? you're screaming and- oh commander Kirkland I didn't see you.. hehe I'll just leave now." he hands America a sheet of notebook paper and awkwardly stumbles out.

America scans his eyes over it and sighs, plopping down on his bed. "welp, Italy's alive. but he's not coming back into battle. instead Prussia is."

"but Prussia doesn't have an army anymore... does he?"

"I've heard legends, just tales and talk, but I've heard that Prussia always has an army on hand. they train in hiding and are sworn to secrecy. he dismisses them of their duty at a certain age and always gains New people. I didn't think it was real though! oh my God... England I'm a little scared..."


	31. Chapter 31

Italy's POV  
____________

my arm dangles uselessly in a sling we borrowed from my doctor, it was a big pain just dangling in my way like that. the wound in my shoulder is completely healed, only two white scars remain to forever remind me, a circle that kinda looks like a flower and a thin line running straight through it.

the stack of dishes clink as I pick them up, hauling them like a waiter using one hand. I swerve around miss Hungary on my way through the kitchen door and giggle lightly.

"thank you Italy for helping me clean, Austria doesn't usually help. but that's okay, I don't really want him to clean because he breaks all our dishes!" she chirps and laughs.

Hungary has been staying here with me so that I don't trip on the stairs and die or something. he doesn't think I can live alone. well, I probably can't. I've had someone beside me my entire life. Germany, big brother Romano, Hungary, even the occasional Spain.

"oh it's no problem Miss Hungary! I enjoy this. I'm actually becoming quite good at using one hand for everything."

she seems pained by something but she puts on a smile so quickly I'm not even sure it was real. "well that's good."

I skim my fingers along the framed pictures in the hallway leading up the stairs. I remember the day that Japan came by with a big box of pictures he'd taken of all us together. I went to the market and bought loads of picture frames. after the pictures were all framed Germany didn't know what to do with them. he started nailing them to weird places like above the oven and in the laundry room. I took the frames from him and did a neat winding path down the hall wall, nailing them In a sort of pattern like the river leading up to the Disney castle. they go up the stairs as well.

a pang of hurt hits my chest and I grip my shirt tightly. I hope he's okay... he hasn't called or anything. it's been three months since he went back and Prussia's taken my place in battle. Germany's directing his soldiers as well as mine.

"hey Italy, why is there a hole in the cupboard?" Hungary calls from the kitchen.

I move back into the kitchen and stare at the large quarter shaped hole in the wood. Germany was to angry at the time to ever fix it.

"it's... it was..." tears well up in my eyes slowly and I turn away. I don't want to cry again.

"it's okay Italy, you don't have to tell me."

I try to stop the memory from resurfacing but it's too late. I can practically feel the arrow whiz past my face and hear it blast into the medicine cabinet. the note.. what did it say?

"I'll be back in a minute"

before she can say anything I'm already out of the kitchen. I bolt down the hallway and up the stairs to his study. I almost break the door down on my way in. I'm surrounded by paper of all kinds, country paperwork, bills, book sprawled across the floor, and war contracts. he never lets me into his study so I don't know what goes on in here. this is so abnormal, he's such a tidy person.

this is gonna take forever....

I trudge through the sea of dead trees and make my way to the desk. first I check the garbage bin. nothing.

Dammit

i rip all the drawers out of his desk, ruffling through them, but still i find nothing. 

sweat rolls down my face after a couple minutes of intense searching. with my eyes half closed i plop into his desk chair, scanning the room one last time. 

perched on top of the filing cabinet to my left is a folded piece of notebook paper.

BINGO

i jump to my feet and reach for it, but i stop myself. my hand frozen mid reach.

what if it's really bad... this note made him so angry... maybe he didn't let me read it for a reason..

 

my curiosity gets the best of me and i grasp it in my shaking hand. my breath hitches in my throat as i open it.

it read:

Italy will never forgive you for what you did during WWII you Commie


	32. Chapter 32

Italy's POV

____________

but... but i forgave him..! 

but there's a pain in my chest telling me otherwise. During WWII a lot of my citizens were Jews, so a large amount of my people were lost. i feel as if Germany has been lying to me about my arm. I lost lots of people then and i felt the numbness, but nothing like this.

I crumple up the paper and toss it in the bin. America really messed up this time, Germany must have propped it up there to fuel the fire.

i hear a crash from the kitchen and my head pops up. In a hurry i rush down the stairs to see Hungary sweeping up a broken coffee mug, the brown liquid splattered across the floor. 

"ah i'm sorry Italy, i was just distracted by something outsi-" her eyes flick out the living room window and she straightens up, whipping a gun out of her hidden holster. my breath hitches in my throat at the sight of the pistol and i clutch my chest. my heart beat speeds up dramatically and i begin to whine, salty tears rolling down my face without permission. the tight feeling of my chest only intensifies and i cant seem to breathe. 

Hungary glances at me and a worried expression plasters her face but she stays in her ready-to-shoot position. 

i fall back against the kitchen wall, sliding down to the floor. the tears cloud my vision.

Hungary's POV

_________________

oh no what should i do?! He's having a panic attack... but he hasn't had a panic attack since he was a kid!

I decide to keep my attention on the bush in the front yard, watching it rustle. not by the wind. a tuff of blonde hair is visible over the top of the bush but there isn't a cowlick, 

England... sent to spy on Italy!

I'm not afraid of that crazy Brit! he probably wouldn't even see me if i opened the door because he's got fairies or something flying in his face!

I keep my gun up and ready, making my way to the front door. i throw it open but stay inside. there's a possibility he's not alone. when i check either side of the doorway i stand up straight. 

"HEY KID GET OFF OF MY LAWN!" 

he jumps and i see his green uniform covered in... glitter? i watch him scurry off, mumbling things like "you see flying mint bunny? you blew my cover. maybe you should be more quiet next time! this is why we cant have nice things..."

when he's gone i quickly shut the door and put my gun back in the holster, hurrying over to Italy's side. his hand is clamped to his sweat drenched shirt and shaking wildly. 

"Italy, hey, I'm right here." i say softly, brushing my hand through his hair. "okay i need you to count to 10 with me okay?"

he faintly nods his head, his chest heaving up and down.

"uno"

"u-un.."

"due"

he opens his mouth and squeezes his eyes shut.

"due..."

"tre, c'mon it's alright"

his eyes flutter closed, he must think he's fainting.

"no Italy you're okay, you're not going to pass out."

his shoulders slump and his body relaxes, but his eyes don't open.

"i...Italy?!"

i press my fingers to his neck, feeling a pulse but it's barely there.

Whipping out my phone, i call the only doctor in the area who knows how to treat countries. he picks up after the second ring.

"Doctor i need you here now, Italy and Germany's house. Italy had a panic attack but now he's not responding and his pulse is weak!"

"be there in five"

he hangs up and i snap my phone shut, jamming it in my pocket. a tear slips from my eye and a lump forms in my throat. Italy's like a little brother or a son to me... I cant lose him now. Especially when his country needs him. i don't get it, you don't usually pass out from panic attacks., I've done research and it said you may feel like you are if you have a fear of it. but does he have that fear?

i dial Austria's number and tell him to come quickly. he agrees and says he's on his way.

Doctor doesn't ring the bell, he just walks in and sees Italy propped up against the wall.

"tell me what happened here, and clear off the table for me."

i rush to the table, picking up the papers stacked on top of it. we maneuver around the glass from my mug and lay him on the table.

"i was sweeping up the glass on the floor and i saw England spying on us from the bush so i pulled out my gun and Italy looked at it and started freaking out. He had panic attacks a lot as a kid but i don't think he's had one since."

"and why is his arm in a sling?" he asks, ripping open Italy's shirt

"he was shot in the shoulder in battle but there was something on the bullet, like a curse or something and it was actually killing him. he had a day left to live and somebody came in the middle of the night and surgically removed the bullet."

a light was faintly glowing within his chest, pulsing weakly with his heart.

"ah i've seen this before. Only the person who casted the spell can reverse it. but he doesn't have much time left. who put the curse on the bullet?"

the door creaks open and a voice comes from the living room. a British one.

"I did."

i whip around pointing my gun once again at the Englishman. 

he raised his hands in surrender. "i didn't come here to fight and i wasn't spying either. after somebody removed the bullet, the killing process was delayed and i calculated it to today. i came to reverse it. I didn't intend to kill him, i performed the wrong spell. i only did what i was asked."

my hand wavered slightly but i don't put the gun down. "And how do i know i can trust you? huh? you could make this worse if you wanted to!"

"but there isn't much i can do to a dying man. Dying from this curse is excruciating. There isn't much more i can do to him even if i wanted to."

I remain silent for a few seconds, pondering over whether or not i should let him. But we're running out of time...

i nod my head slowly, beckoning him over with my gun. he complies and hurries over to the table just as fast as i'll allow him. 

he places his hands above Italy's chest, one hand over the other and closes his eyes. i keep my gun against his head in case of any mishap but Doctor gives me a look. i sigh and lock my gun on safety, putting it back in the holster.

"ita et lumen eius adorate Dominum in virtute juramenti hujus anima viri istius eris a tenebris.

Tollo cum pondere, ut in fine huius benedicat mihi anima mea quia tempus ab eo.

Hoc corpus quod pro omnibus maledictionem aeternitatis perierunt."

England raises his hands slowly and the light leaves Italy's body as if he were pulling it like a string. my eyes widen as the light quickly turns to black. he scrunches up his face in concentration and gives his hands a yank, extracting the rest of the black gas substance out of Italy's chest. it dissolves into nothing and Italy sucks in a huge breath, his eyes flinging open.

I let the tears i realize i've been holding in fall and i engulf Italy in a hug.

"I'm so glad you're alright!" i cry.

Doctor turns to an Exhausted looking England and helps him into a chair. "Thank you England, that was very generous of you to give up part of your soul for him."

"what soul," England smiles weakly. "i lost my soul a long time ago."

Doctor laughs. "i sure hope you're joking Arthur."

i look over at the door to see a very stunned Austria.

"um... did i miss something here?"

________________________________________________________________

Englands spell:

"with the power of light i lift this curse so let this man's soul be free from darkness.

i lift this curse with a heavy burden to pay at the end of my time for my own soul in return.

let this curse be perished from this body for all of eternity."


	33. Chapter 33

One Month Later (End of war)

Germany's POV

______________

I slide the bullets into the magazine of my gun, preparing for battle. Rain droplets drip into my tent from holes made by the Allies.

Verdammt... this is ridiculous. i overreacted six months ago and now my men have to live and fight in these terrible conditions. am i even fighting for Japan back? or am i fighting because of the note...? i hope Italy's okay, we don't have phone reception anymore so i haven't been able to contact him in almost two months. i... miss him..

"Lieutenant Beilschmidt, the soldiers are lined and ready." General Otis calls from the tent entrance.

i sigh and put the magazine down on the little card table. "At ease General."

General Otis relaxes a bit but keeps his grand posture. his not-so-blonde hair is a bit long, so i require him to pull it up in a small pony tail. He's a good friend of mine, i wont force him to cut it off.

He walks over to the table, his large boots making a satisfying splash in the muddy soil. Otis' blue-green eyes smile at me as he sits down across from me.

"Somethin' botherin ya?"

Even though he is German, he tries to take on a weird accent. well, he used to be a bartender. I guess thats how Bartenders talk stereotypically. 

i gaze off at the tattered tent wall. "i dont even know what we're fighting for anymore. Japan made a choice and left for the Allies."

Otis slants his mouth to the side a bit. "ya never really specified what this war was 'bout. Ya just, freaked out 'bout somethin' and then next thing we know you're callin' in for all your forces."

"America shot an arrow with a note attatched to it, through my open window, barely missing Italy's head."

" 'nd the note said?"

Otis is cool and all but he just doesnt know how to mind his own business...

"It said 'Italy will never forgive you for what you did during WWII you Commie.'"

"ouch"

"Thats all you have to say? ouch? DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I SUFFERED AFTER WWII ENDED? ALL THE PEOPLE I KILLED? I WAS LITERALLY NUMB ALL OVER MY BODY FROM WHAT I DID."

i want to say that so badly... but i refrain myself.

"why do you care so much about that weaklin'?"

"Italy is not weak"

"He cant even run a lap without needing food bribery"

"Stop talking. Now. You dont even know what he's been through. Do you know what it's like to be a country? Pain and Misery and never happiness. if you feel happiness inside you, embrace it. because it's not going to last long. Sure Italy cries too much and he smiles all the time but only Hungary, Austria, Romano and I really know what goes on in that brain. He's scared shitless. He tries his best to make us all proud but he just cant take all the pressure on his shoulders. Remember when you broke you're leg that one time?"

Otis slowly nods, his eyes wide.

"and how it really hurt?"

he nods again.

"well imagine living for thousands of years, watching everyone you get attached to slowly die off, and having countless injuries. Italy's broken both his legs at least 10 times. each. arms? probably more times. he's had his head bashed in. he's been tortured. when drills were invented, that's when torture got twisted. you know nothing."

I suck in a deep breath after my small explosion.

"i- i see. Italy aint a weaklin' i guess."

"ja."

"I'll... be goin' now. Come out when you're ready. I guess."

i rake my hands through my hair in frustration. Why do i feel like I've needed to clarify that. 

An ear splitting explosion erupts outside and the earth shakes the cardtable. Rushing outside i see my soldiers staring up at the cliffs. 6 sillouettes stand against the sun.

"HAHAHAHA AXIS FEEL OUR WRAAAAAAAAATTHH!" America basically screams at us. "THIS IS OUR LAST BATTLE. JAPAN IS OURS AND WE'VE COME TO THE CONCLUSION THAT THIS WAR IS FREAKIN' STUPID AND THERE'S NO POINT TO IT."

"BLOODY HELL AMERICA YOU WERE'NT SUPPOSED TO SAY THAT!" England screams next to him.

"TOO LATE NOW EYEBROWS IT'S ALREADY BEEN SAID."

_________________________________________________

TIME SKIP (again... sorry. i dont want to write out the whole battle process ;-;)

2 days later

_____________

i collapse against the side of the cliff, clutching my bloody leg. nothing that wont be healed by tomorrow. Though the others... that's different. Men lay injured and nearly dead, littered across the mud. Even more are... already dead.

I cant let this get to my head now! 

"GET UP YOU POTATO BASTARD! WE HAVE A WAR TO FINISH!" Romano yells a few feet away from me.

"How is it so far..?"

Romano walks over to me and kneels down at my side. "England, China, France and Surprisingly Russia have all surrendered and left. Only America and Japan remain."

"good."

Gun shots and missels are fired for many more hours, injuring and murdering more of our men but we manage to keep our numbers higher that the Allies.

I loom over America, watching him cough up blood and smirk.

"never."

"Just give up and surrender. now. It's over."

"it's not over until i win."

I pinch the bridge of my nose "why are Americans so stubborn..! you've lost! we won!"

"what are you even fighting for Germany? Do you want Japan back or something?" America wipes the blood away with his bomber jacket sleeve and stands up once again.

Japan, who I never realized was standing just a few feet away, butts in. "I told you I'm not just material to be traded off. but since I've been here that's all I've felt like." (I'm stopping his accent after he said felt which would have been fert)

America laughs and points at Japan jokingly. "nah man he doesn't mean it."

"hai. actually I do."

"what?! why?!" America exclaims loudly, a look of puzzlement glued on.

the scowl on Japan's face could kill. "the way you just keep me around for extra soldiers. to make Germany angry. it's infuriating!"

I stare in shock, mouth hanging open a bit. Japan can raise his voice?!

" I thought we really had something America... but you threw me away! where's your boyfriend now, huh? he left. he's already surrendered. I don't want to be a part of this anymore."

"but you.. can't leave... you signed a-"

"England burned it for me. it's over."

everybody is silent for a while, contemplating over what just happened.

I raise my finger and point at the both of them. "so you two..."

"sort of." they say in unison.

"does that make us all gay in this story?"

"we're in a story?" America asks.

"I don't even know anymore."


	34. Chapter 34

Italy's POV

______________

After Germany came home yesterday, he was informed of my little "incident" and i havent left his sight since. I cook? he's there. i use the bathroom? he's outside the door if not standing in the shower. It's getting a little weird but i dont really mind i guess. the only time he left my side was when he said:

"I'm going out for a while and might not be back until dark. Stay in the house okay?"

i nod in compliance. i wonder where he's going

He hasnt returned yet so i'm a bit worried... i hope he didnt get hurt...

Germany's POV

_____________

i make my way into the department store, my tall built body accidentally knocking over a child. she begins to cry and i help her up, appologizing to her and her mother. i give her a smile and her mouth twitches a little, trying not to smile back. 

i laugh under my breath and walk into the jewlery department. once i step in my heart does a double take and nervousness floods over me like a tsunami. 

IS IT TOO EARLY

WHAT IF I GET THE WRONG SIZE

I LOVE HIM SO MUCH BUT WHAT IF HE ISNT PREPAIRED FOR THIS

AM I EVEN PREPAIRED FOR THIS?

I DONT THINK I AM

"Um, sir? may i help you with anything?"

i snap my head up quickly, my face flushing. "oh uh, yes. I'm looking for the perfect ring.."

"oh i know, come right this way, please!" the lady cheerfully says.

"....."

"is something wrong?"

"no not really, i'm just wondering how you knew that."

she swiftly spins behind the counter-like display case. "oh, you look really nervous and you're sweating. that's how every guy is in here. so what is she like? personality wise."

i glide my eyes along the selection of diamond rings. "well h-she is very kind and compassionate. she's always smiling and she just makes my heart melt."

her smile grows ever-so bigger, if that was even possible. "oh my, i've been waiting for so long to sell this ring. nobody has seemed to like it because it's too simple but it's absolutely perfect!"

she slides the back of the case open with a key and extracts a small silver box. she snaps it open and my breath hitches in my throat. "you're right, it is perfect!"

The ring is a light silver color with small white gemstones encased around it. in the middle is a slightly bigger pastel spring green gem.

"I knew you would."

"i feel like you've been waiting to say that."

"its the sad truth but yes haha.. everybody wants the big extravagant rings for their lovers."

"whats the size?"

she tells me and my smile faulters a bit. you can size it right? It's a little big..."

"of course mister..."

"Beilschmidt."

"okay mr. Beilschmidt, we can size it for you! come over to this counter and give me the size."

about 10 minutes later she has all the information and papers filled out. the ring is bought!

"come back in about 30 minutes to retrieve it!"

Italy's POV

_________

i sit on the couch watching an Italian cooking show when my cell rings.

i swipe the screen and answer it, It's Hungary!

"Chao Miss Hungary! how are you?"

"I'm doing well Feli, How're you feeling?"

i giggle. "I'm feeling well and alive!"

"That's great!" her voice is light and cheery. "so has Germany stopped following you around everywhere?"

i lay down on the couch, my legs dangling off one of the arms. "kind of. he said he was going to the store but he wouldn't be back 'til later. He's been gone for a long time and i got a phone call earlier from a restauraunt asking for him. they we're talking about reservations or something but they hung up when they found it was me."

Hungary begins laughing and giggling so hard she was snorting. "Congrats Italy! I'll call you later okay?"

i become confused and before i can say anything she hangs up.

The front door swings open as i stuff my phone in my pocket. 

"Ve~ chao Germany!"

his cheeks tint a little pink and he chokes out a 'hello'.

"oh get you're jacket on, we're going somewhere."

"but it's 10 at night! where are we going?" 

"you'll see." he smiles kindly.

It seems that germany has been able to smile a lot easier now adays. he's a lot more laid back than he used to be.

i slip on my Italian flag jacket and wait for him by the door. he comes down the stairs and grabs my hand lightly. No matter how many times he takes my hand, i still burn with heat. 

"you look nice today." he grins giving me a one over.

"u-uh thanks Germany." i blush. i dont look that good, i'm just wearing a pair of those baggy-yet-skinny jeans and a plaid over shirt over Germany's black Rammstein shirt.

he opens the door and drags me out to the car. opening the passenger door, i slip in and wait for his to get in as well. he stands behind the car and seems to be talking to himself. after a minute he gets behind the wheel and starts the car.

on the way to wherever we were going i stared out the window wonder struck. the stars are shining so bright tonight!

we pull up to the local park Germany and I bring Adler (his dog).

The park is almost completely empty except for some late night reminiscers. 

i stay silent as Germany gets out and opens the door for me and leads me to the top of a hill. he holds both hands in his and kisses me softly. i kiss back before he pulls away. "i really love you italy, and i want you to say something for me."

"oh okay Germany!" i chuckle and smile. "but why are we here?"

"just close you're eyes okay?"

i close my eyes."

"say pasta for me."

I burst out laughing and scream "PAAASTAAAAAAAA"

"okay keep you're eyes closed. do you know what is better than saying pasta?"

"i dunno... nothing?"

i hear him chuckle.

"no, saying 'yes'."

my mouth opens a little as i feel his hands leave mine and he says "open your eyes"

i slowly open them, completely unprepaired for what i see. Germany down on one knee with the most beautiful ring.

"will you marry-"

"YES!!!!"

i tackle him in a hug, happy tears rolling down my flushed cheeks. he loses his balance and we start rolling down the hill.


	35. Chapter 35

June 14th

wedding day

Germany's POV 

__________________

"verdammt vest hold still! you're shaking like you're stuck outside in the snow with no clothes on!" Prussia sighs, irritated that he can't fix my bow tie.

"s-sorry.." but my shaking doesn't stop. I'm just so nervous...

the room remains silent and I glance at my reflection in the mirror past Prussia's shoulder. my black suit fits loose, but not too loose. a dyed orange rose rests neatly in the breast pocket. Prussia made a big fit about how my slicked back hair was too military and this is a happy occasion. so he "helped" it with hair gel. it looks greasy but it still looks good, I might wear it like this more often.

"I'm proud of you.." Prussia mumbles under his breath. he's obviously embarrassed about saying it.

the corners of my mouth twitch up a bit into a small smile. "thanks."

"kesese~ you're getting married... " he chuckles, giving my bow tie a yank. "sweet mercy finally." he sighs, talking about the bow tie. I hope.

"I remember taking care of you when you were just a little birdie-"

"Oh gott are you going to get all emotional mother on me?" I joke, pushing his arm a bit.

"nein! would I ever?" he gasps dramatically, his hand to his chest in mock shock. we both erupt into laughter.

the door creaks open behind us and I turn to see who it is..

but nobody's there.

"hi..." a faint whisper says.

Prussia's face lights up into a huge grin. "Birdie! come in!"

as he says those words a man with blonde hair and a wild curl, surprisingly more wild than Italy's, walks in. his purple eyes are happy behind his thin glasses and he smiles as well, a bit more nervous but it's a smile.

"y-you look great Germany. I love what you d-did to your hair." he whispers, clutching his teddy bear.

"Oh thank you Canada." I smile, mostly because I forgot who he was until Prussia slipped a piece of paper in my hand saying his name.

I reach up to brush my hair back strictly out of habit but Prussia swats my hand away with the speed of a ninja. (hehe because we all know Germany loves ninjas)

"NEIN! I SPENT 20 MINUTES ON YOUR HAIR AND I REFUSE TO SPEND ANOTHER!" he yells, trying to be serious but he ends up laughing at the end.

I roll my eyes and stick my hand out for Canada to take. "well it's nice to meet you finally. you're dating my brother and I just know meet you. I hope he's treating you well."

Prussia wiggles his eyebrows and Canada blushes crimson red.

Oh God.

I clear my throat. "alright then."

___________________

Italy's POV

_____________

I smile widely in the mirror, loving how I look. my white suit looks fantastic with the dyed green rose in the chest pocket thing. the laundromat did a really good job at cleaning my suit last minute! you'd never know I dripped spaghetti sauce on it!

after England lifted the curse, I could gradually feel my shoulder again. I now have full function of it so I don't need the sling anymore.

Romano puts the net thing on me and it drapes down the back of my head. I frown a bit. what's it called again?

"what? you don't like it? you're the one who picked it out!" Romano whines.

"no I love it! it looks great! um... what's it called?

"the veil dumbass"

"Oh yeah."

a knock sounds from the door and Romano sighs angrily. in a high pitch girly voice he yells

"You know it's bad luck to see the bride before the wedding!!!"

I burst into laughter, snorting a bit.

Hungary opens the door, glaring at him.

"shut up." she says teasingly.

Romano smirks, "no, you shut up." they both chuckle

I never understood that, they say it a lot so it must be an inside joke.

she looks me over, nodding in approval. before I know it she's embracing me in a hug. "congrats Italy, you look beautiful."

Romano raises an eyebrow. "he's not beautiful he's hands-"

"I'm damn GORGEOUS" I interrupt, smirking.

his expression is surprised and Hungary laughs really, really hard.

"Oh Italy," she says "never change."

Prussia walks in the door way. he nods.

"it's time."

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Romano took my arm in his as the chapel doors swung open, revealing the beautiful set up and crowd. every country was there! even the allies. I haven't the slightest idea how Germany allowed that!

speaking of, Germany already stood up front. and... God? God was our priest?!

Romano chuckles bit, and I can tell he's nervous.

a bead of sweat rolls down my forehead and I realize for the first time just how nervous I am! I grip onto Romano's arm just a bit tighter and he seems to notice, giving me a reassuring smile. I weakly smile back and my knees start to shake.

the music begins playing and we start walking. my nervousness becomes more and more evident and everyone smiles at me. reassuring me that I'll be okay.

a warmth touches my left shoulder and I look to see... Grandpa Rome?! he grins his cheerful grin and then he vanishes.

tears spring to my eyes in happiness.

once we reach the podium, Germany helps me up and Romano takes his place as best man. Prussia stands as Germany's.

he looks into my open, Brown eyes and chuckles. "I like the veil, it looks lovely."

"thanks, I like your hair. it looks pointy." I giggle quietly.

God clears his throat and begins to speak with his southern accent.

"I gather you here today and wahwahwahwahwah blah blah blah blah..."

I stop listening, sketching out every detail of Germany's face in my mind. if only I could remember this very image forever and ever. maybe if the stars align just right, they could shine as bright as his deep blue eyes. but I doubt that's possible. there's nothing more beautiful than his eyes... not even the ocean, or birds, or pasta-

"I do." Germany says, snapping me back to earth. he slips a golden wedding band onto my ring finger and I gasp. it's so shiny.

"and do you, Feliciano Vargas, take Ludwig to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

I tear up and smile, nodding. "I do!"

"You may now kiss the groom!"

Germany pulls me in gently, his arms around my waist and dips me, connecting our lips passionately. 

the crowd goes wild but I barely hear them, lost in the kiss and the fact that we are now husband and husband.

he releases my lips and I sigh, not wanting it to end.

___

the reception was absolutely amazing! the cake was delicious, because France made it of course, and America was the DJ!

God declared that he believes homosexuality isn't a sin and he loves us all equally. (I'm not religious but I felt like putting this in here because God was their priest. and I assume none of you will be offended because all of you are reading a homosexual story! c:)

Germany and I had the first dance to the song "thinking out loud" by ed Sheeran. whom I love! he's just so amazing!

and who knew Germany could break dance?!

all in all it was a beautiful wedding and Japan took lots of pictures!

now I hope Germany and I will be together forever...

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1 year later

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Germany and Italy walk into their living room, surprised to see Japan, Greece, America, England, France, Russia, China, Prussia, Austria, Hungary and yes, of course, Canada.

they all surround the two in a large group, looking to find bundles of blankets in their arms. Italy and Germany smile as the rest awww.

"the papers were accepted and the adoption was successful!" Germany announces happily!

Italy holds a baby girl, no older than 6 months in a bundle while Germany holds a baby boy.

Italy smiles. "twins! this is Abrielle, and that's Alphonse!" he takes Abrielle's hand and waves around. in a squeaky voice he says; "hi evwybody! it's nice to meet you!"

"ohonhonhon~ you'll be a wonderful mother." France chuckles.

Germany grins. "who said he was the mother?"

everyone goes silent.

Italy's playfully smacks his arm, giggling. "stop it! Haha they're taking you seriously!"

the room erupts with laughter and Alphonse smiles a one tooth grin.

both the children still have blue eyes but specks of green are becoming visible. Abrielle has brown forming in one of her eyes, meaning that that eye will probably be brown. how pretty! they both have short, messy blonde hair as well!

Italy's smile falls. "but one day they'll go old and we'll have to let them go..."

Germany's eyes saddened. "Feli don't think like that.."

"but it's true."

"well not necessarily.." England cuts in. "there's a way."

Italy looks up at him in understanding and he knows what he means.

Hungary gets angry. "I will not, and I repeat, not, let's you lay a finger on those children! I don't care if-"

"Hungary, please." Italy says, seriousness brimming his voice. "let him speak."

Hungary called but says no more.

England takes a deep breath, contemplating his words before saying them. "well there's a certain spell that I ran across the other day after I heard you two were adopting and... I took the liberty of memorizing it. it lets them age, but at a slower rate. so every 10 years they grow a year. and eventually around age 25 they stop growing completely..."

Germany's eyes widen and Italy gasps.

"but they're only human!"

"I know... but so we're we at one point... remember?"

most countries remember around their middle teens, but in their previous life, they all died in some way, and they were chosen and taken back in time to become their country. according to the theory they formed, the countries they lived in had somebody else running them at the time. and after something happens to them, they become the new one.

we all nod our heads and the room becomes silent.

Italy looks over to Germany. "should we...?"

"it's seems like a good idea to me... but will they be happy? never being able to grow old? they can have a family of their own one day but they'll eventually die too.. I don't think we should Italy.."

Italy nods. "that makes sense." he exhales, saddened. "we won't do it. we won't take our children's happiness away for our happiness. if they grow up and decide they want that, to stay with us, then so be it. but they need to grow up like normal humans."

America smiles. "I believe you've made the right choice dude. wow, marriage really made you a responsible person didn't it haha!"

Italy giggles. "no, they did!" his smile grows wide, gesturing to the babies.

China and Japan made us dinner with a mix of Japanese and Chinese food. as we sat in the living room, scattered on the couch and floor, we told stories. Japan and Greece are together, America and England are still together and apparently America proposed! Prussia and Canada (who?) are engaged as well and everybody is happy again. because, you know, after every war it seems that they all become friends again in a matter of 5 minutes. Japan also pulled on America's cowlick, making him blush like mad and excuse himself to the restroom. (Japan is happy with his discovery). England went in after him.


End file.
